New Jobs

S.A.T., the Spite Agricultural Traders, i.e. Huilam [Jamie], Sorrow [Jeff], Moonlight [Chris] and Dee Dee [Steven] (and Huilam and Sorrow's lady-escorts), awoke in Sam's mansion. Ensconced in their lavish bedrooms, they delighted to music wafting down the hallways. The music was from a string quartet performing in the dining room. The piece was Barque's Shoulder Prelude in Eb Minor (from the Well-tempted Clavicle). "Barque" was John Sebastian Barque, of course, the famous Bar-oak gnome composer.

During the lavish breakfast, Huilam asked Sam if tours were possible of the plantation warehouse and the seedling rooms. Sam said not often, but he would make an exception for SAT, especially since they were interested in the yellow scabs. He told Huilam he would arrange a time with Miss Prisk.

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Later that morning, with everyone now back in the party's lair, Rita's [Ian] long-overdue casting of Detect Evil took place. As well-augured, Sorrow and El Cid [Shane] glowed dull purple (the frequency of pure evil is 780 THz). And Attlee [Kevin] glowed a spectacular throbbing bright purple.

"Will you repent and turn from this vile evil?" asked Rita. "We can have you purged in the REAL temple and cleansed of your foulness; cleansed of your dark miasma."

Tylin Brooks

The three didn't think they were evil at all, and of course refused.

So, Rita said she could not sanction or condone their darkness. So, she tended her resignation, there and then, and left the Budgie Smugglers for good.

"I will be at the REAL temple," she said.

After Rita had gone, Esme, the party secretary, piped up and said she had a new applicant in the latest cohort drive. An elf from Palantir called Tylin Brooks [Ian's new character]. He worked for the Elwins, who was a trading company in Palantir.

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El Cid and Attlee went to IMAG temple to see Priestess Clara.

While they were waiting for Clara to arrive, Attlee said: "If Rita has left us, why can't we do the IMAG jobs?"

El Cid shrugged.

Priestess Clara soon arrived and El Cid told her that, regretfully, the group would not be doing the IMAG "skull distribution" job.

Clara was most put out by this.

"The Foundling will not be very pleased," she said. "Nevertheless, El Cid, you may go. However, we require Attlee to stay. The Foundling wishes to converse with him after dark."

Attlee stayed.

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That afternoon, SAT (Huilam, Sorrow, Moonlight, Dee Dee) arrived at Sam's Plantation. Miss Prisk greeted them, and took them through a tour of the experimental facility. Here they saw all the various scabotanists doing their trade, and saw the many trays of scab seedlings and cultivars. including the yellow scabs. Sorrow took note of the building itself - a large warehouse made of the fantasy-equivalent of corrugated iron and colour steel (read paper-mache, wicker daub and extruded gypsum-clay) with a slate roof. On top of this structure was the search-light (probably light stones and illegal optics) and the security observation centre.

Sorrow asked about the owl bears and Miss Prisk said "Oh yes, we have some beasts. Security is important."

Afterwards, they met with Sam Baxter again and talked shop. SAT offered him a deal that they would be sole buyer for the yellow scabs. Sam said, if experimentation proceeded to plan, that they would be mass-planted in half a year, and the first crop would be ready in one year. He stated 45 COIN per wagon would be a reasonable starting place, for yellow scab futures. And he'd want a pre-order of at least ten wagons. But he'd need to see some money up front, of course.

The group realized that this was venturing outside the Budgie Smugglers' raison d'etre and comfort zone. After all, they are supposed to be "daring smugglers" rather than "honest scab traders". So they agreed to his suggestions and claimed they'd be back.

"We give up that job?" mused Huilam on the way home.

"Let it stew."

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That evening, after dark, at the IMAG temple, the Founding arrived to see Attlee and his black skull (the one found in the Fort Eugor keep office). The skull could talk to Attlee in his head, and over the last few days, the two had bonded. The skull was called Lido, and it could give Attlee the occasional one-off gift. But not continuously; sort of like a battery. Nevertheless, Attlee was discovering the "warm joys of IMAG":

The warm joys of IMAG

The Foundling also suggested to Attlee that he should commit himself to IMAG and become a fully-fledged priest.

"Then 'the piss never turns cold'," said the Foundling. "But, it IS a big commitment. It is a one-way path. For to leave IMAG is the path to annihilation of the soul. So, it requires, as the Funk and Wagnalls say,  'informed consent'. I offer this choice to you. IMAG calls you. Lido calls you. You will receive great power. And Lido will be your 24/7 guide."

Attlee thought about this for a minute.

"Do I have to choose now?" he said.

"No. The offer stands always," said the Foundling. "Lido will help you."

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Lieutenant Anton Chung

There was a pile of notices stuck to the party notice board in the Luscious Pixie tavern. Esme had been so busy with SAT and the new offices, that she had neglected to check them. And none of the group had remembered.

Lieutenant Anton Chung, of the Knives, wanted a word. Chung no longer worked as a gate guard and was now stationed at the Knives Headquarters in the Royal district. So the entire group headed there.

"First off," said Chung. "I am please to announce that the Budgie Smugglers are now 'preferred contractors' to the Knives."

Smiles all round.

"I have some of jobs for you," said Chung. "You know the Scabport Prison?

"On Prison island, at the mouth of the Scab River?" said Sorrow.

"Aye," said Chung. "It's run by us, and mainly for political prisoners and hostages. There's a prisoner in there called Michael Stringfellow. Want him to vanish. So you sneak in, and off him. Don't leave the body; no trace, no questions. 11 COIN."

Simone Ender

"The second job is linked to Dalila Hornsby. 'Member her? From Fort Eugor. We want you to capture another witch; this one's called Simone Ender. She's a minor notable of the Wizards' Guild. Hold her alive somewhere safe and then get me within half a day. Be careful of her; if she gets a spell off, you'll be toast. Literally."

He handed them a small picture in a silver frame.

"Here's a recent portrait," Chung continued. "And we have an address for her in Downtown district: 112 Duke street. This one pays 10 COIN. Oh. If you pull this one off, there'll be one more witch of the triumvirate to nab."

"As usual," said Chung tapping the side of his nose. "The Knives and me will disavow all knowledge of any of this work."

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Scabport Wizards' Guild tower

When the group got to Simone's Downtown house, it was a burned-out abandoned ruin. This had happened a while ago: four weeks according to neighbours.

They did a thorough search. In one of wrecked rooms was a wall-safe. Moonlight cast Detect Magic on it and the safe glowed. Sorrow suspected a magical trap. No-one was brave enough to go further, so they left it.

In the tiny Wizards' District of Scabport there is only one inn called Tower Lookout. It did indeed look out over the Wizards' Guild tower. This inn was frequented by wizards, as expected (wizards are recognizable by their velour robes). A few of the group passed time in here to see if she was about, and asked some surreptitious questions.

Someone thought about a more direct approach. Since they had done work for the Wizards's Guild in the past, they remembered their contact there: Sly Dunbar, a WG HR jobsworth. And asked him some surreptitious questions. Yes, he knew Simone, and yes, she is living on the tower.

"Why do you need to talk to her?" asked Sly.