Tuesday, January 13, 2026

No Way Out

Present:

  • Anastasia "Stasi" Tepes. Zhodani Soldier from Querion – Shane
  • Emerse Gee. Daryen Scientist from Torment – Darryl
  • "Riley" Patrick O'Reilly. Sword-Worlder Pilot from Winston - Richard
  • Anton Tositova. Solomani Gunner from Entrope - Ian
  • Sang "Spanner" Hoang. Sword-Worlder Mechanic from Winston – Jeff
  • Hoff Ende. Sword-Worlder Scientist from Winston - Kevin
  • Belle Ende. Sword-Worlder Medic from Winston - Steven
  • Itzy Ende. Sword-Worlder Soldier from Winston - Chris
  • Gnostic Hands. Solomani Scientist from Entrope – Jamie
  • NPC: Scurry. Drone Gunner from Winston


by Richard/Riley

Recap


It was daylight. The entire party was on a hilly plain under a rose-coloured sky; bright, and from the brightness on the horizon, it looked like the sun had just set.  The air was very dry, and they could smell ozone. Behind them was the portal, a clear hole into the cave - it wasn't a mirror on this side. In front of them was a lake, the size of four soccer fields, of red liquid, like the same stuff in the cave's "tidal" pool, with white lumps floating in it.

In front of them, fifty paces away, standing on the left shore of the lake, was a huge spider, twenty storeys tall, with 12 or 14 legs, with multiple eyes on prehensile stalks. The giant spider's eyes weren't focused on the party, instead they were focused on the thing that it was devouring. This creature was one of the illithid creatures that the party remembered from the derelict freighter Gnost Roma orbiting Formalin (where Liz died). The wretched thing was held by four "mandibles" which looked like human arms with claw-hands, as a porcelain beak mouth nibbled away at it. It thrashed about, half-eaten, but still alive, and it screamed hysterically. It had no voice-box, so they were voiceless rasps and croaks. Pieces of its intestines, cartilage and some bone, with lots of blood, were falling into the red lake.

Off in the distance, several kilometres away, was a nightmarish city, that looked like jagged sections of thick metal welded together, to form spikey structures, buildings and towers. And in the air, around this city, was a thick swarm of what looked like gnats at this distance. Close-up, they'd be the size of vultures or dogs.

Hoff, Belle and Itzy Ende's sister Split (Penny) did not come through the portal for some reason. [Jason shifted away, so's no longer in the group].

The Signal


Having been unable to re-enter the portal we felt a strong urge to move on, out of the sight of the horrid spider. 

"We must get off this god-forsaken planet" we all thought.

Emerse's radiation monitor was going mad and peaking at 40 µSv/hour. And his RF monitor was getting lots of random static on all frequencies, most seemed to be coming from the sky. But there was a strong 500KHz AM signal from nearby. He tuned in on this.

It was old fashioned Imperium morse code. A repeating signal. .... . .-. . .. .- --
No Galactopedia link here. But it was lucky he had a local cached copy.

"Emerse, what's the code?" we asked.

"Arghh, it says Here I am" responded Emerse combing his hair whilst nervously looking at the huge spider.

"Where's it come from" I barked in a deeply unhappy mood. I had limited whisky resources, and my beloved ship was on the other side of this portal near the Cauthon Institute.

We quickly moved behind a rise and now hidden from the spider the nerdy bunch (Emerse, Gnostic, Hoff and Belle) undertook some brief triangulation calculations and determined it was coming about one click (kilometre) to our left.

"Let's go," Anton enthusiastically says and volunteers to lead the party stealthily and out of the sight of the spider. 

"What are you so happy about fat man?" I grumped.

Anton led us successfully for a click in the direction calculated and we come to the edge of a hill with an area dug out in which is a long wire that runs into a small lean-to hut some 10 metres away. 
[note Anton has the best sneak skill with a double roll and can guide the party if successful.] The irony of Anton sneaking whilst being severely overweight and in a bright yellow X-Boat suit is not lost on many of us. 
hut
the hut

Congregating around the taut wire was a swarm of large bees or hornets. 
Hmmm we've seen those before many of us thought and some of us plugged our ears.

Anton headed toward the hut and cautiously looked in. Nothing strange in here he thought until he noticed a stone on the ground with letters on it. 

He headed back to the group.

"Anything interesting?" asked Gnostic

"There was a stone with writing on it"

"Did you bring it back?" asked Stasi

"Nope, easier to take you to it"

With a rolling of eyes, we all make our way to the hut.

IFDE LLTA TOAA EIFV 
IRTD SCOO SMTT TKRI 
TEHO SSTD OTIW PTHA 
OOSA IHIL DHSR RERL 
AAOD ENTS NNUS FHYO 
GGRT OACP EACH RRLH 
RREE TDIO OOST ELCN
UUOA NEKT SNHL CFSS

After much chatter, the nerds decide that it’s a transposition cipher. Emerse uses his computer to run several scenarios, and the nerds intensely work on the code – forgetting for the moment that they are on a god-forsaken planet that appears to be largely made of mushroom.

Interestingly Emerse's use of his computer attracts the hornets. He quickly turns it off but we all note they are drawn to electronics.

"Got it" they collectively chant, rubbing their hands together in glee. "It is too dangerous for me to hang around at this source. So, head toward the tallest spire for 10 clicks and then hard left for 30 clicks. Avoid all sophonts."

On the Move


spire
the tallest spire
Picking out the tallest spire we head off.

The ground is spongy like a thick carpet and there are giant blue tinged leaves here and there on the ground that are even more soft and spongy. What appears to be large mushroom growths can be seen growing at various intervals along the way. We can see flying creatures in the distance, just spots on the horizon.

The air smells clean but with the tinge of fungi. It never gets dark, just this pink glow of dusk.

"What a hole" I muse, steadily becoming more dour and dark.

We make the 10 clicks and then turn hard left. We all realize we cannot do another 30kms without rest. Some of us were struggling even now. Indeed, Anton lay down only to feel the wriggling of some unknown creature on his back making him quickly stand up.

"Have some whisky, it will help."

We walk another 10 clicks and now some of us are really struggling. I have the shivers and sweats; Gnostic was never built for this sort of terrain and even Stasi is tiring.

"I can carry Gnostic" volunteered Itzy.

"And I can get Riley and Stasi going," said Belle as she injected us with what was essentially speed.

Another 10 clicks and Emerse is lagging, exhausted. 

Suddenly, there is a bright flash of lightning covering the whole sky, horizon to horizon, then hissing and ticking, like rain on hot rocks, and which gets louder and louder, followed by intense deafening thunder that rocks the ground and knocks us off our feet. The lightning seems to impact everything, and all metal on us conducts a voltage spike giving us a huge jolt, like an over-powerful electric fence. Everyone carrying anything metal gets damaged. Pistols give a light zap [1hp], but the swords and machine guns give a huge whallop [D6 and D8]. 

Electronic items need a save. My laser carbine fails and is ruined.

Emerse's precious Tamagotchi, his laptop, radiation meter and radio headset all manage to survive [bit of luck spent] but most of the party's headsets were fried.

Scurry survives.
 
Fortunately, Emerse has his birdcage-sized faraday cage, so he stores as many electric things as he can fit within. The cage needs to be grounded to be totally effective, but the main lightning storm discharge seems to be preceded by flash, two seconds earlier. That gives him time to jam an earthing spike into the ground.

Emerse is also given a shot of speed by Belle, and we all trudge on to complete the final 10 clicks. We enter low hills and there is more rock here and we can safely stop. Over the time there have been several thunderstorms and they seem to occur every 6 hours.

As we come around the side of a rise we see what looks like a path which of course we follow. It leads to a large rock with some more carved writing.

Sergeant Gunn


ITOT TUZL FHUH TSSP
YIAY EEES OSRO NONI
UFEF TNDG GAWM IEAN
OROY OMHA TYRA NHEL

Another transposition cipher which this time the nerds quickly solve.

"If you got this far, you are worthy of my attention. Use 1 MHz, send a help signal."

Emerse uses his radio and sends SOS in Imperial Morse. 

"Now let's see what happens," he says. 
ben
Sergeant Gunn

We wait an hour…. Nothing.

He resends the signal. We wait. This time a figure appears around the hill. A tall very-muscled humanoid, with a tentacle arm and a huge eye.

"I come in peace. I am Sergeant Ben Gunn," he says in English with a look of surprise on his face. "Uh... welcome to planet Rose."

[Psyche rolls all round - DM forgot! We will do this next week.]

After recovering, Emerse jumps in and explains our situation and who we are.

"How long have you been here?" 

"About a year"

"Where are you from?"

"The Cauthon Institute. I was on Strike Team One"

"What happened to your eye and arms?"

"I think its the radiation over time. My Vargr friend here, he didn't mutate like me, except he is now a wolf, with not much mind, I call him Fido. And I found six Zhodanis here - they had no mutations, but their minds were gone too. They are now my whores."

"Nothing unusual there," says Itzy quietly. "We have one of those."

"New meat?!" Ben says leering at Zhodani Stasi, whipping out his large appendage - it was mutated too, and was enormous.

"Come this way" and we follow him a few hundred metres to a cave system.

"I'm the last of my squad", he explains. "It is safer to live underground, here, and that protects you from the lightning storms and there is plenty of food and water, although it takes a bit to get used to", pointing at a red pool of gloop. "You can also sleep comfortably on those large blue leaves. And when you are done can extract the food and healing from them. The storms sort of charge them up."

Over the course of the "night" (it is day all the time here) we all try and eat the vultures (bird meat from a flying creature - it tastes like muddy chicken) and purple goop that comes from the blue tinged leaves. The purple goop heals damage too [D4 per dose]. We also all try the red "water". 

[The "acclimatization" mechanic: Each time a person eats or drinks from local sources they make a CON roll. If successful, the food & healing works. And their CON in relation to the food and water improves by 1. Once the effective CON reaches 20 then they become "acclimatized" and no longer need to roll. 
If they fail, they vomit, feel ill and can't eat for D6 hours. 
If a 1 is rolled, CON increases by D6. 
If a 20 is rolled, all additions are lost.

The resulting CON positions at the end of the session were:
  • Gnostic +10 (17)
  • Belle +5 (13)
  • Stasi Reached 20
  • Hoff +7 (16)
  • Itzy Reached 20
  • Emerse +0 (8)
  • Riley +10 (18)
  • Anton +4 (15)
  • Sang +0 (9) ]
the Zhodanis
Over the next 48 hours we rest, come down off speed and have long conversations with Ben about the planet. Anton, Gnostic and Itzy also take advantage of the "Zhodani whores". The vampiric Zhodanis, of course, feed on them in return. (Ben's neck was quite a mess already)

Stasi was eager to try out Gunn's enormous organ, so she spent the "night" with him.

Cauthon Institute's Janet Drive said that a squad of Zhodanis came here at least fifty years ago. We had no idea if these Zhodanis were remnants of them, so it was a mystery.

From our discussions with Ben we glean that:
  • There appear to be no spaceships or vehicles on the planet. I am now entering into a depressive state.
  • The only way off planet Rose, Ben suspects, is by successfully finding one of several portals and find a way through the portal.
  • The "slishers" rule the city. They come in three sizes, and we have encountered the adult form and the "scuttlers" previously on the derelict freighter Gnost Roma orbiting Formalin (where Liz died).
  • Ben thinks this was an Ancients' planet and there are several Ancients' sites. Ben knows of one where what he calls "The Oracle" lives. In fact, this is a servitor. 
  • It would appear the slishers have taken over from the Ancients.
We discuss going to see the Oracle. 

The Oracle


The next day we head off on a further 2-day journey. We stick to the rock covered hills as much as possible and near the end of day 2 (not that it gets dark) come over the crest of a rise and see a cave mouth.

"We need to be careful of the snake" states Ben.

"Ahhh what snake" Hoff nervously mumbles. 

"The 50 metre long 30 cm diameter one"

"Have you fought it?"

"No, I ran away"

"Oh"

So, keeping a watchful eye out we quickly scramble to the cave opening and see a tunnel descending in front of us. "Déjà vu", many of us think remembering the Ancients' tunnel in Winston.
tunnel

With that in mind we make formation, Gnostic and me at the front, and move forward carefully watching for signs of glyphs. Anton who is at the back glances out of the cave and sees the large snake come down from the hill. It is grey coloured and would be very hard to spot if still.

After a time Gnostic spots, a 60cm waist high faint light emanating from the wall ahead. Following close inspection, we have no real conclusion but do know that Ben previously walked straight through the faint beam, unharmed.

We decide discretion is the better part of valour and ensure everyone ducks under the beam before continuing.

We enter a room with a "steam" door on the other side with the oh so familiar handprint. 
Gnostic confidently puts his hand on the print, and the steam goes revealing a passage behind. We proceed down into another room with a further handprint and a further exit passage.

"This is where the Oracle is" announces Ben.

"I bet it appears if we put our hand in the print" says Gnostic as he does exactly that.

With a slight whir a man appears – a beautiful specimen – Stasi gasps.
big jim slade
Servitor

The servitor speaks English and so we can all understand him although he is only interested in engaging Gnostic.

The conversation continues for some time 

"What's your purpose?"

"To provide information"

"How do you leave the planet?"

"Via a portal"

"Where is the nearest portal?"

"Spire City."

"Where does the portal lead?"

"They don’t work that way – you enter coordinates"

"Can you draw us a map?"

"I can describe how to get there."

"Yes please" and he does

"What are the coordinates for Winston?" 

"What is Winston?"

The servitor was an Ancients' creation so would be 300,000 years old. It wouldn't know of current system names. But Emerse had an Imperium star chart in his cached Galactipedia. He managed to find a coordinate system and star descriptions that the servitor could recognize.   

The servitor converted this to the Ancients' 128-bit coordinate system and worked out where the Ende estate in Raven's End on Winston would be: 3fb6afe5-ed9b-41d0-916a-18243fdfc083.

Similarly, the coordinates for the Cauthon Institute on Seven in 728-907 is 4fc15c18-e814-4bd3-a256-87a1118cbc8e.

And the coordinates for Entropy, namely Sydney Walsh's X-boat office, is 40c80ad9-caba-4310-a50f-9cebede665dc.

"Can we have the recipe for Mushroom Whisky?" I asked.

"Boil mushroom juice and distill it."

"What do the Ancients look like?" 

"Neptard Lizards on their hind legs"

"Who are the tentacled creatures?" 

It says something unintelligible.

Ben replies "Slishers" 

Fortunately, I have a photographic memory and could remember every detail. Emerse not trusting this also took notes on his computer.

With this information to hand we thank the servitor and decide reluctantly to head to Spire City. It’s a four-day trip and two of those can be in the hills before we need to cross the plains and risk being spotted.

But before that Ben in insistent he collects his six "whores" and Fido so that they can go back too.

"Oh, by the way Ben" asks Emerse. "Why did you use a transposition cipher?"

"Cause the slishers can't understand them and aren’t smart enough to decode them"

And with that "comforting" thought that these creatures are dumb, we head off back towards the tunnel entrance and the snake.

Saturday, January 10, 2026

Planet Rose


    rose
    Rose-coloured sky
  • Anastasia "Stasi" Tepes. Zhodani Soldier from Querion – Shane
  • Emerse Gee. Daryen Scientist from Torment – Darryl
  • "Riley" O'Reilly. Sword-Worlder Pilot from Winston - Richard
  • Anton Tositova. Solomani Gunner from Entrope - Ian
  • Sang "Spanner" Hoang. Sword-Worlder Mechanic from Winston – Jeff
  • Hoff Ende. Sword-Worlder Scientist from Winston - Kevin
  • Belle Ende. Sword-Worlder Medic from Winston - Steven
  • Itzy Ende. Sword-Worlder Soldier from Winston - Chris
  • Gnostic Hands. Solomani Scientist from Entrope – Jamie
  • NPC: Scurry. Drone Gunner from Winston
  • NPC: Finn Cyborg from Querion

by Andrew.

Recap


The intrepid party, working for the powerful X-Boat Corporation and nominally for Hoff, Belle, Penny and Itzy Ende's mum Contessa, had been shot many parsecs across Known Space by a misjump, and were hurriedly making their way back home to Winston. 

On the way, they arrived in the recently-settled Imperium system 728-907, and while on the ground had been contracted by the Cauthon Institute to explore some tunnels under the Institute's base (in the town of Seven). The Cauthon Institute had sent men down here a year ago, who never returned. So they wanted some other volunteers to find them.  There were also stories of a Zhodani squad ("platoon" or "company" depending on who you asked) "from the Twelfth Regiment" going missing down here too, many decades pre Cauthon.

In the tunnels, the party encountered an Ancients' portal. Dr Gilbert of the Institute was most insistent that this be explored. So here we are.

The portal was supposedly one-way only, and volunteer Anton had gone through. He did not return in the specified time, so they all decided to join him (as loyal parties are wont to do).

Wilhelm Scream


It was daylight. The entire party was on a hilly plain under a rose-coloured sky; bright, and from the brightness on the horizon, it looked like the sun had just set. The gravity was normal, but the horizon looked closer. The air was very dry and they could smell ozone. Behind them was the portal, a clear hole into the cave - it wasn't a mirror on this side. In front of them was a lake, the size of four soccer fields, of red liquid, like the same stuff in the cave's "tidal" pool, with white lumps floating in it.

But that wasn't what drew their attention, because in front of them, fifty paces away, standing on the left shore of the lake, was a huge spider, twenty storeys tall, with 12 or 14 legs, with multiple eyes on prehensile stalks.

It was a terrifying Cthulhuesque sight. A nightmare. An abomination of nature. Sickening.

The giant spider's eyes weren't focused on the party, instead they were focused on the thing that it was devouring. This creature was one of the illithid creatures that the party remembered from the derelict freighter Gnost Roma orbitting Formalin (where Liz died). The wretched thing was held by four "mandibles" which looked like human arms with claw-hands, as a porcelain beak mouth nibbled away at it. It thrashed about, half-eaten, but still alive, and it screamed hysterically. It had no voice-box, so they were voiceless rasps and croaks. Pieces of its intestines, cartilage and some bone, with lots of blood, were falling into the red lake.

Off in the distance, several kilometres away, was a nightmarish city, that looked like jagged sections of thick metal welded together, to form spikey structures, buildings and towers. And in the air, around this city, was a thick swarm of what looked like gnats at this distance. Close-up, they'd be the size of vultures or dogs.
 
Terrified, the whole group turned around and tried to hurry back through the portal. The level of the red lake was such that it lapped at the bottom of the portal circle, and obviously into the cave. The portal was on a vertical rock face, and it looked like there had been a recent rock-fall which had exposed it. Maybe it was once buried.

Anton was crouched down there gibbering "I couldn't get through. I couldn't get through."

Sure enough, the transparent portal had some kind of a field across it, and felt like rubber to finger-touch - the more you pushed, the more it pushed back. Metallic, wooden and plastic items, when pushed against the field, scraped, like metal on concrete.

Liquid from the red lake obviously dribbled through. And pieces of the cartilage and bone could go through too. The group posited that organic matter will go through - after all, the mercenary's arm managed - but maybe it had to be dead.

Anton now decided to risk dipping his hand in the red liquid. It felt warm and slimy. But even covered in the liquid, the portal field still blocked him.

Emerse's radiation monitor was going mad and peaking at 40 µSv/hour. And his RF monitor was getting lots of random static on all frequencies, most seemed to be coming from the sky. But there was a strong 500KHz AM signal from nearby. He tuned in on this.

It was old fashioned Imperium morse code. A repeating signal. .... . .-. . .. .- --
No Galactopedia link here. But it was lucky he had a local cached copy.

Astrophysics for the dedicated


[Call all this "foreshadowing". The party's characters do not know this ... yet.]

The planet Rose orbits a 12km diameter neutron star (“sun”) on a 81 day circular orbit (72Mkm). (c.f. Mercury 46-70M km & 88 days). The sun's mass is 2.2 Sols, and the surface temperature is at one million degrees K (c.f. Sol 5800K).

15kW xenon arc lamp
On the surface of Rose, the sun appears as a super-bright tiny pin-prick dot (0.03 arc-secs, the cross-section of a human hair at 1km), like a giant arc-welder’s spark or the centre of a xenon arc lamp; shadows are super sharp. Rose's solar energy at surface a bit more than Earth (1500 W/m2 c.f. 1380).

Rose is tidally locked to the sun, so there are no light and dark times; Rose's "day" is the same as the year. Rose is on a 10 deg axial tilt which is maintained by a Cassini state 2 resonance (precession is in the same resonance as orbit time), so the sun does a little analemma dance in the sky from -10 to +10 degrees over the year. There is no concept of seasons.

Rose is half the size of Earth, but has 0.9g gravity at the surface, and has a convenient Nitrogen-Oxygen mix like Earth. 

It's a young planet, so its dynamo core (iron) is very active and incredibly strong. This means the resultant magnetic field protects the atmosphere by diverting the sun's streams of charged particles (c.f. Van Allen belt for Earth). 

Nevertheless, the neutron star still bathes Rose in periodic streams of synchrotron radiation (which are not subject to magnetic fields). This interacts with the ionosphere and produces violent EMP blasts which enwrap the entire planet. They appear visually as super auroras of all colours, and cause a cacophony of sounds in the air.
  • Instantaneous Click/Buzz: A sharp, high-pitched sound as the electromagnetic pulse hits.
  • Immediate Hiss/Chirp: The eerie, high-frequency VLF chorus begins as the EMP interacts with the magnetic field and ionosphere.
  • Delayed Rumble: A few seconds to a minute later, the ground-shaking, continuous roar of planetary thunder arrives and drowns out everything else.
  • Reverse: As the EMP fades, the thunder would slowly die down, the high-frequency chirping would fade, and finally, all would fall silent until the next occurrence.
EMP blasts are random - every few hours one strikes (1 on a D6 per hour).

Like the Carrington event on Earth in 1859, any metal at ground-level gets massive voltage spikes from the EMP blasts. Any electronics is fried unless it is well-hardened (good faraday cages) or underwater/ground.

The weather is more driven by the EMP blasts rather than solar radiation.

Life here has evolved from the regular EMP blasts. The flora uses "electrosynthesis" rather than photosynthesis. The electrosynthesis does the same chemistry as photosynthesis (but without light), it turns water into O2 and uses the stripped H+ ions to turn ADP into ATP.  So, after each EMP blast, plants are filled with ATP synthase which then quickly converts atmospheric CO2 into glucose (normal Calvin cycle) and fixes carbon.

This means electrosynthesis works in the dark, and thus life is found on the perpetually dark side of Rose as well.



Tuesday, December 23, 2025

Cody's Surprise

 Present:

  • Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
  • Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aquamarina from Porn City – Jamie
  • Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
  • Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
  • Esmeralda "Esme" Abernathy. Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
  • Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
  • Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
  • Willow Woods. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
  • Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
  • Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl
 
by Andrew


Recap (to the carol tune of "St Louis")


O little place of Surrey town, how still we see thee lie! 
A party comes to take one down, beneath a cloudy sky. 
For in thy house a bitter plan was set to work its might, 
The hopes and fears of one old girl were met in curse that night.

For Amelia, in her grief, hired Sancho's Da'Vid Moorn. 
He hired foul Otto, killer scum, a wicked plan to form. 
Otto found Magnus, lowly thief, from Porn City, so bold, 
To steal spear from barbarian hand, a story to be told.

That cursed spear, a deadly thing, to Vincent de Throak it went. 
The magic worked, the death-bells rang, a life so greedily spent. 
Then Thespian, from Wizards' Guild, forced Cody make the call: 
"Go kill Amelia now," he willed. "Your party, one and all."


The Ambush Plan



Cody here. My turn to write in this damn diary in person - first person this time.

Every evening, Amelia had been observed being escorted to her home by the Surrey sheriff, through the village streets. This was at the same time each evening, 10 be'light. The group was too wuss-scared to dare take her on in her house. She had some mastiffs that wandered her yard, and the party was scared of the big bad dogs.

So, the plan was to ambush Amelia and the Sheriff as they passed the cleverly-hidden party in the street. I would use two Silence spells. One Silence would be placed on the road, and as soon as Amelia and the sheriff walked into that region, then I would cast a second Silence at her feet. At the same time, Kippy and Munch would pepper her and the Sheriff with arrows. Then the fighters, Tom, Rock, Grim and Jack would rush in to engage.

"Still not sure why we are doing this," said Esme. "I think we're backing the wrong horse."

"We voted last time!" squeaked Munch.

Esme, a child slave herself, now supported the death of (evil child slaver) Throak and could empathize with Amelia, so she decided that she would not participate. She would only provide healing support.

We all lurked hidden and skulking at a good spot on the main street. Surrey was a tiny town, so the streets were deserted.

10 be'light came and went. No sign!

So, we wandered down to Amelia's residence and staked it out.


Stake Out



We ended up watching her cottage-cum-tower for three days and nights, observing continuously by rotation, perfectly hidden.

Every day the sheriff would go in and feed the dogs. Occasionally, movement could be seen through the windows of someone walking within.

cottage
Amelia's cottage and tower

Plan A


Getting nowhere fast, we suggested Fat Willow do some in-person reconnaissance. So, using his druidly powers, he turned into a fat sparrow and he flew up to the arrow slit at the top storey of the tower.

Half an hour passed, and then an hour. (The ability only lasted 30 mins). He never returned.

Oh dear.

"Looks like we gotta go in," I mused. "Plan A after all."

The question was, do we go through the dogs and sneak in the front door, or go through the back door. The other wusses didn't want to go through the back door. They thought it was a honey trap. 

We had a vote: Dogs it was.

So, Tom poisoned some hunks of meat, then Munch chucked these hunks of meat into the yard with the dogs. They ate both hunks, and they writhed around on the ground. They were making so much whimpering and groaning noises as the fell poison did its thing, so I cast Silence on them to stop the noise. They eventually died; after five long minutes of agony.

As will be made clear later, let me state now, for the record, that I specifically did not vote for the dog route!

Inside


Then using Detect Traps from me and Ardern and Jack, we made our way into the building. Esme stayed outside (with the dog bodies) guarding the rear. As mentioned earlier, she was not willing to be part of this assassination.

Inside, there was a kitchen, and a guest bedroom. There was a picture in here of a lady, presumably Amelia, with Otto and Emance and a young girl.

cat door
Oh dear...
There was an internal cat-flap, and lying on the ground next to the flap was a single sparrow feather. A fat feather.

Oh dear.

The kitchen had a stairway going down to a basement and through a secret door to a passage. This lead to the base of the tower joined to the cottage. 

In this room, the basement of the tower, was a whole lot of junk. I cast Detect Magic and a rocking-horse glowed, a morning-star flail glowed (1H blunt) and a dress-maker mannikin glowed too. 

We carefully entered, but as soon as we got in, they all animated, and came hurtling towards us. Aaargh!

We rushed out and slammed the door.

Back upstairs, through another room and door, we get into the ground level of the tower (level above the animated things). This level of the tower was empty but for a winding staircase going up and down.

In here, there were some more sparrow feathers.

Onwards and upwards: Kippy followed by me, Tom, Munch, Ardern, Jack, Grim and Rock.

maul
Floating maul
On the next level was a study. It contained a desk, and lots of books lining the walls. On the wall was a large two-handed maul, and there was something on the desk, the size of a half-elf head, covered by a shroud cloth.

Kippy and I went in a bit further, but before I could cast Detect Magic, the maul detached itself from the wall and hurtled towards us!

It savagely whacked Kippy HARD.

Tom and Munch came up the stairs next. I frantically tried to avoid the vicious maul, but no luck, and it whacked me HARD.

Kippy wrenched off the shroud on the desk. Underneath was a white crystal ball.

The maul targeted Kip again and knocked him down.

Everyone else got inside the room.

I then did a Detect Magic, as Munch rushed up the stairs - but he vanished! The maul glowed, the ball, and the desk.

Ardern rushed over to Kippy, ready to cure him.


Amelia



"Stop this nonsense now!"
We then heard an elderly woman's voice "Stop this nonsense now!"

The mace paused, and flew back to its cradle on the wall.

Amelia, herself, walked down the stairs in a nightgown, with a cat.

"Where's our Munch?" I asked weakly.

"He's up here visiting. With your sparrow. Your fat sparrow. I knew you were coming here. It's about time, Cody Dieback."

I blinked.

"H...How do you know me?"

"I know you well. I know your mother. Greta Dieback"

Blink.

"But Ferranti Stevens killed her. Killed mummy."

"Are you sure?" she said.

Blink.

"She is still alive," she continued. "I know her well. She would not wish you to harm me."

"I agree with that!"

"You killed my dogs," she stated.

"W...well *I* didn't. In fact I voted not to go that route."

"A life for a life, is what I live by. And I have two of your people. You have come to kill me. So fulfill your task and leave."

"N...Not if you know my mummy. I will protect you. Thespian wants you dead."

"I killed Vincent because he killed my grand daughter"

I recovered a bit.

"We seem to be at an impasse then," I said. "So ... um... your cat didn't get our sparrow after all?"

"No, that was just a joke."

Joke indeed.

"I've done no wrong," said Amelia, changing the subject again. "And yet you killed my son."

"Who was he?" I asked.

"Otto."

"Oh, that prick. He deserved to die. Did you know he was rutting... your daughter?'

"I did," she said. "That's how I got a grand-daughter."

Blink.

"You approve of that?"

"You can not fight against blood.  So, again, take my life, if you wish."


Greta Dieback



"No," I protested. "I ...uh... changed my mind now. You know my mum."

She pointed at the desk.

"The crystal ball will tell all."

"What, talk to my mum?"

"Touch it and see."

I touched it, tentatively. There was a thrilling tingle up my arm, so I immediately put both hands on it and lovingly embraced it [failed Arcane Defence save]. Through the misty glass, I  saw a woman's features come into focus: "Mummy!". 
greta
The Red Witch

My mother, Greta Dieback, was still just as beautiful, and hadn't aged a day. She was now a powerful witch in the Central Plains. Known as the fearsome "Red Witch". We had heard this name two seasons ago, when we were first working for Ester (the barbarian druid in the Central Plains).

Having lost all motive to harm Amelia, despite Thespian's threats, I moved up the stairs to protect and aid her from the group. Not that this was really necessary. Their hearts weren't into this mission any more.

Esme, tired of shouting abusive adlibs and unhelpful commentary from outside, joined the group inside.

Amelia, sensing danger towards her had dropped, said "In return for your lives, I hereby give you a task. I would like the Spear of the Elessari Circle returned to the Central Plains Barbarians."

Thespian currently had the spear, held in the Porn City Wizards' Guild.

"I will pay you nothing, but the Plains Barbarians will reward you well. So, your choice is simple. Either kill me, or do my task."

"I am not going to kill you," I snapped. "No way."

"You will protect me."

"Yes, my mother would want me to protect you. But you're perfectly safe anyway. No-one in my group is brave enough or motivated enough to do this now - except maybe Rock. I was the only one pushing this barrow anyway, using the threat of Thespian and the Porn City Guild. But that has completely changed now."

Rock gazed across at the eighty-year-old's chest, in her nightgown, hoping he could see some lovely lady lumps. 

Noticing Rock's misplaced lecherous stare like the other night in the inn, she waved her hand. This time Rock vanished in a puff of greasy black smoke. Then, with another wave of her hand, Munch and Willow (back to normal), looking rather surprised, appeared in his stead.

"I will write up a contract which you will all sign tomorrow," she said. 

"Also, you will need to decide which member of your group you will sacrifice," she said coldly. "As payment for killing my dogs. A life for a life, as it were."

"How about if we bring you the head of Thespian?" I offered.

"That would be adequate."


T O   B E   C O N T I N U E D


Richard's DMing stint ends here.




Tuesday, December 16, 2025

Inside the Onion?


Present:

  • MARMALADING: Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
  • Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aquamarina from Porn City – Jamie
  • Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
  • Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
  • "Esme". Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
  • MARMALADING: Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
  • Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
  • MARMALADING Willow. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
  • Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
  • Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl
 
by Jeff

The Decision

"Well, I agree with Cody" stated Jack, "Let's just head over to Surrey and check out this Amelia"
"Cody, what do you think?"
"Cody?"
"CODY?"

Cody was slumped in the chair in the corner of the room, limbs akimbo, head lolling to the side, and marmalade oozing out of his mouth and down over his chin.

"Oh" laughed Jack, "Cody's out"

Sancho and its barren coastline
There was nothing much in the regions around Sancho; probably no one was game to set up shop anywhere near the depraved cesspool that was Sancho, but a few small hamlets dotted the coastline nearby. Retirement villages and small farming outposts predominantly. Surrey was one of these, located about a days journey Klibward up the coast.

Munch slipped out to hire a small, covered wagon (the weather was miserable, pissing down with rain and cold as) and we upped sticks and headed for Surrey. Esme and Tom walked ahead while the wagon was hired and provisioned, wrapped in their rain gear, while the rest of the crew waited in the dry. 

Once the wagon was ready, they all rested in dry comfort under the wagon cover as Munch cracked the whip and drove the horses onward. 

The wagon caught up with Esme and Tom around midday, and Kippy laughed at the bedraggled state of Esme and Tom.

"You should just ride the wagon with us" Kippy called.

"F' off" muttered Esme, feeling queasy just looking at the wagon wheels turning.

[Esme suffers from the Travel-Sick Fault. She must make a successful roll (at a penalty-roll two dice and take the worst) against her Constitution (11) or succumb to sickness. Tired of regular 'barfing' and being mocked by the rest of the party, Esme no longer rides on a wagon! Tom was walking with her to make sure there were no surprise 'encounters']

Surrey

We arrived in Surrey just before dark. It was tiny little hamlet; "population 82" declared the fading wooden sign at the edge of town. There was only one Inn, the Raven & Emerald, and so we crowded in. Only a few other customers graced the small barroom, and an older woman manned the bar.
Agnes was her name, and Kippy struck up some conversation.

Apparently, Surrey only had the one church, of Super Fosfait, on account of the rich vein of said super phosphate that surfaced nearby, "Directly under the church" Agnes noted proudly.

"And did you know that Sancho itself was built over a thick vein of super phosphate too" she declared.
 "I figured it was a pile of shite" quipped Kippy rudely.

Agnes stared at Kippy with a frown, before turning away with a disgruntled huff.

The next morning, we trooped off to "visit" the church (and reconnoitre the rest of the town).
A priest of Super Fosfait was working in the pastor's office, and a grizzled old man was worshipping at the altar. Munch went forward to chat to the old guy.

He was named Walter Brock, a retired Temple Fighter of Super Fosfait, and he also served as the local sheriff "When sheriffing is required" he added.

[At this point in the evening, Stephen dialled in and the assorted items of party treasure were distributed, according to the well-established protocols of treasure distribution.
Jason obtained the Cloak of Hiding (Invisible when stationary)
Andrew obtained the Boots of Stealth (+2 to Stealth rolls)
Andrew also obtained the Letter Opener of Discretion (Can discretely open and reveal the contents)
Jason obtained the Dagger of Cauterization (Ignores armour and can cauterize wounds)
The Sword of Venom was turned in and later sold for two thousand gold pieces.]

Grim inquired of Walter about the people "Living hereabouts" but Walter wasn't very forthcoming.

Jack took a stroll through the town (about fifty metres down the main street) and spotted an old stone cottage with a small, attached stone tower. A large tree towered over one corner of the cottage, and two large mastiffs lay in front of a large dog kennel out the front.

"Tower" thought Jack, "Tower ... Wizard ... Amelia ... Found her!" his thought stream concluded.

Kippy slipped into some trees and began a period of surveillance. The dogs patrolled regularly around the house and just before dark Amelia was spotted leaving the cottage. Kippy's eyes tracked her down the street and into the Inn. 

The rest of the party were already in the Inn, and saw an old woman enter and buy herself a drink.
After about ten minutes, Walter from the church entered and joined the old woman at her table.

"Check it out" Rock grunted loudly, ogling the old lady, "A double-D for sure!"
Of course, everyone in the room heard him and turned to stare.

The old woman stared back at Rock with a sharp steely expression. A cold chill passed over Rock, and then Walter wandered over.

[Fortunately, Rock made a saving through against Arcane magic otherwise there is no telling what may have eventuated and what may have occurred to Rock. But no one was any the wiser, apart from the old woman who now had an idea of Rock's magical resistance]

"Best not to stare at her" Walter calmly stated, leaning over Rock, "Folk round here might get upset"
"She's a might sensitive since her husband passed away some years ago" he continued.
Walter's hand rested suggestively on the hilt of his needle-sharp rapier.
"Ahh, fair enough" gulped Rock, turning away from the old woman.

Subtle inquiries with the innkeeper revealed that this was indeed Amelia Wilson. She had been "someone" in the Sancho Wizards' Guild and had retired to Surrey some years ago when her husband, a "big deal trader" from Sancho passed away "in mysterious circumstances".

The party decided to stay on in Surrey for a few days, to "relax and enjoy the restful atmosphere" they declared to anyone who would listen. In fact, a few days of consistent observation found that Amelia followed a regular daily pattern.

Home for the day.
Feed the dogs just after lunchtime and take them out for a walk.
Down to the pub at 10 be'light.
A couple of drinks with Walter.
A simple meal.
Back home, escorted by Walter.
Home all night.

"Let's sneak into her house while she's at the Inn" suggested Jack.
"Nah" declared Munch, "It'll be trapped up the wazoo"
"Well then, lets ambush her when she walks down to the Inn" suggested Tom.
"Nah" declared Munch, "It's too light. Anyone could see us"
"How about we jump the both of them when he escorts her back home at night" suggested Grim.
"Nah" declared Munch, "He's a big deal fighter and there'll be too much noise"

"OK" countered Esme, "How's about we head back to Sancho and get a bit more information"
[Esme wasn't keen on killing Amelia and she was up for anything that might delay the inevitable]

"OK" said Munch.

Back at Sancho

After another day of travel, we arrived back at Sancho.
It still stunk like a cesspool and everyone still had shifty eyes.
But we all retuned to The Sable Lilly and took rooms again.

The next morning, Kippy and Esme, armed with bags of gold, visited the Whisperers' Guild to buy some more information. Esme set about negotiating a fair price for said information.

The Whisperer Informant was a shifty eyed fellow

"500 gold" said the shifty eyed guild flunky.

"Done" said Esme, dropping a large and heavy sack on the table.

"Oh" responded the flunky with some surprise, "I'll just get our Informant for you"

Another shifty eyed fellow in a black cloak sidled into the room and sat on one side of the desk.

"What ya be wanting to know then?" he whispered.

"Tell us about Amelia Wilson and her husband" asked Esme.

"Well ..." he sighed, "Amelia Wilson, née Venning, was originally from Porn City and emigrated to Sancho many years ago. She eventually married Willie Wilson, a high-ranking trader in all sorts of illicit goods here in Sancho and a staunch card-carrying member of the guild of thieves. Their marriage ran into some difficulties about three-four years ago when rumour has it that they had a personal conflict of interest. They separated and sometime later old Willie was found in his bed, the life sucked right out of him as though drained by some ancient undead denizen of the underworld. Following that, Amelia just wasn't right in the head, and she retired out to a little place called Surrey, just up the coast, but you know that already, don't you?"

Esme's eyes had lit up at "Venning".

Venning was a well-known family name in Porn City, in fact the Vennings ran the Thieves Guild in Porn City and are one of the more powerful families there. Even though Esme wasn't from Porn City originally, she had heard of the Vennings!

Before he could take another breath, Esme thanked the shifty eyed informant profusely, and she and Kippy hurried back to the party to report.

"Sure, sure, but what was this conflict of interest?" queried Munch.

"And did Amelia actually kill the husband?" butted in Grim.

"And 500 gold" complained Jack, "Why didn't you ask for more information?"

"No pleasing some people" grumbled Esme, and she and Kippy grabbed another sack of gold and returned to the Whisperers' Guild for another bite of the cherry.

"1000 gold" said the shifty eyed guild flunky.

"F' off" swore Esme, "500 gold"

And she dropped another large and heavy sack on the table.

"Done" said flunky, "Wait here"

The same shifty eyed fellow in the black cloak sidled into the room again.

"What ya be wanting to know then?" he whispered.

"Tell us about Willie Wilson and any of his dealings with Vincent de Throak" asked Esme.

"Well ..." he sighed, "Willie Wilson, as you know, was rather a big deal trader here in Sancho, a powerful and well-respected member of the guild of thieves, known to deal in all sorts of illicit goods. Anything really, for the right price. But his specialty was people. He could get anyone, of any race, any age, any sex, for any use. For trade with Porn City Willie would often deal with Vincent de Throak, a somewhat estranged member of the infamous ruling family of de Throak. Vincent's specialty was children, he could supply children of any age, any race, any sex, and any lineage!"

The Informant's shifty eyes darted from side-to-side, and he leaned forward and continued quietly.
"Rumour has it that Willie had ordered a teenage female from Vincent, one with potential. And one was provided, apparently an orphan, a child of the powerful Venning family"

Esme's eyes lit up again at "Venning".

Amelia Venning's husband had bought a Venning girl from Porn City!
And she had bought her from Vincent de Throak!

Before the Informant could take another breath, Esme thanked him profusely again, and she and Kippy hurried back to the party to report.

"That's got to be it" declared Jack, "Amelia killed them all on a family matter"

"Could be, could be" mused Munch.

A report was sent by Gnome Post back to the wizard Thespian at the Porn City guild.

"Now" declared Esme, "We just need to wait for his response"

This would be a three week round trip, even by Gnome Post, so the party hunkered down in the Inn. No excursions were made out into Sancho, meals were taken in the Inn, drink was consumed, fights were avoided, bills were paid, and arguments nipped in the bud.

Kill Amelia!
Three weeks later a reply came by Gnome Post.

"KILL AMELIA"

"What else does it say?" asked Grim.

"That's it" replied Jack, "Just those two words"

"But what does that mean?" asked Munch, "Surely not that we should kill Amelia?"

"That wasn't in our contact" stated Esme, "No way"

Votes were taken.
The party decision was to execute the instruction.

By executing Amelia. We were off to Surrey again!

The Giant Lizard

Aiming to set up a discrete campsite base a half hour travel from Surrey so we could carry out further reconnaissance and launch our attack, Kippy selected a nice spot in a shallow valley, hidden from the surrounds, and next to a quiet stream.

"Fresh water" declared Kippy happily.

[ Unbeknownst to all though, Kippy had totally fumbled his Survival-Wilds roll and failed to spot the large and deep footprints that marched along a well beaten trail beside the stream.] It wasn't until much later that night while everyone was sleeping, apart from Munch and Jack who were on watch, that this unfortunate oversight was eventually discovered.

It started with a quiet rustle in the distance downstream, heard by both Munch and Jack, and quickly escalated into a rowdy rumble, cracking and smashing of bush, and thumping vibrations from heavy footfalls. Munch, utilizing his Night Vision Talent, quickly drew a handful of arrows from his quiver and got two away in quick succession. Jack rushed around the sleeping party, yelling aloud and waking everyone, then threw a bunch of kindling onto the small campfire.
A giant lizard charged out of the night

Tom grabbed his trusty club and stepped forward bravely, staring at the giant snarling lizard revealed by the flare of light from the fire. 

This thing was huge! It towered above Tom and swung its jaws down towards him, spittle flying from its rows of needle-like teeth. 

Dropping his bow and drawing his sword, Munch joined Esme, Jack, Rock, and Kippy in their attack on the giant lizard's flanks while Tom held its attention at its head.

The lizard's hide was thick and rigid, many of the successful blows just bouncing off and jarring our attacker's arms. [The creature had a five-point armoured hide; five damage points subtracted from each successful hit's damage] Tom managed to avoid the creature's attacks, striking the creature in each of the three rounds of battle. Tom also utilized his Heavy Hitter Talent [spend 2 Luck on a successful melee attack to obtain an additional damage die] to make the most of his strikes. 

It could have turned out quite differently, but the giant lizard was subdued and killed in only three melee rounds, with none of the party taking even a scratch.

"Lucky that thing didn't hit you" noted Kippy, "That's known as a Death Lizard out in the Waste!"

"Yeah" muttered Tom, "Lucky indeed"

After all that excitement, it took a good half hour for everyone to get back to sleep.

"I hope Cody is awake tomorrow" mumbled Grim as his eyes slowly closed.

......

Tuesday, December 9, 2025

Yet Another Layer

 Present:

  • Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
  • Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aquamarina from Porn City – Jamie
  • Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
  • Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
  • Esmeralda "Ezme" Abernathy. Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
  • Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
  • Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
  • MARMALADING Willow Woods. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
  • Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
  • Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl
 
by Andrew

Recap


Porn City sybarite and sodomite, Viscount Vincent de Throak, had recently met a horrible death when he had taken possession of a powerful magical cursed spear-head. 

In Letchtown (satellite town of Porn City), the group had tracked down an Otto (now deceased), who was the one who had paid a Magnus (deceased) to fetch and deliver the cursed spear-head to Throak. And the group had determined Otto's employer was a Da'Vid Moorn of Sancho.

So, the whole group had gone to Sancho. They were staying in the posh inn The Sable Lilly.

The Castrated Virgin


Esme visited the famous Sancho Whisperers' Guild. This was an off-shoot of the Sancho Thieves' Guild who were willing to sell information, for a price. She found out that Da'Vid Moorn owned the Castrated Virgin tavern in a suburb of the city called the Veins.

"Now we just need to capture, torture, and question him," some wag volunteered.

Sancho streets were busy at night, so the group made its way through the Sancho smog to the Veins. The Veins was a shady seedy place full of warrens, brothels, pubs, dubious shops and places you could buy any thing (or any one) for gold.

The Castrated Virgin tavern was pretty much of a dive. It had a few burly guards, and a fighting pit. The group sat down at a grimy table and ordered a five course degustation meal each - five delicious courses accompanied by specially-chosen wine to compliment the delectations.
  1. gruel
    Watery tepid gruel accompanied by a fragrant pond-lilly wine (kissed by the musty roots of a pond lilly).
  2. To cleanse the palate, this was followed by a sorbet, of semi-frozen slushy ram semen.
  3. Belette enflammée sur un bâton (weasel on a stick) in a delicious curdled-blood jus.
  4. Then Croque Mademoiselle Putain (crunchy whore). Melted cheese from nanny-goats who had run with a billy.
  5. Dog testicles dipped in chocolate.

During the feast, an ugly dwarf approached and introduced himself as Thorick Hodenbrecher. He was attracted to Esme and offered to pay for some whore-action.

"I am not a whore !" said Esme indignantly. "The Soixante Neuf temple does it for donations. We are not whores."

"Oh, it's free then?" said Thorick. "That's fine by me."

They got talking and 
maud
Maud Fassbender
Thoric pointed out another lady, the current manageress of the establishment. So Esme spoke to her.

She was Maud Fassbender. She was running the tavern in Da'Vid's stead. She had not seen him for a while; twelve weeks, in fact. Needless to say, twelve weeks coincided exactly with the death of Vincent Throak way back in Porn City. Was that significant? The group didn't know.

The rest of the eve was quiet, and the group withdrew to their inn. On the walk back to the Sable Lilly, some hapless thugs try to rob them.

Tom ended up whacking a thug (with a critical) and almost killed him. But this certainly served to scare the other thugs away.

They were more careful for the rest of the journey. Munch, Kippy, Grim and Cody (the good sneakers) would take turns hiding and watching for followers.

Munch went first and spotted two malcontents following the group. He diverted the group to another tavern and then confronted the followers. This turned out to be a false alarm, and an indignant bard was angry at being accused to be a stalker.

The rest of the trip to the Sable Lilly was quiet.

The next day, Esme returned to the Whisperers, after handing over 300 gp and half the names of the group (Esme, Cody, Rock, Willow, Tom) she got some valuable info. 

The Sancho Wizards' Guild likes to collect the names of everyone. This allows them to magically mark them and track them at great distant. Hence valid name collections is a useful form of payment. Is Sancho a fascist police-state? Safer not to dare ask that question.

The Whisperers gave a description of Da'Vid: a fake eye, teeth missing, ugly, 6'4, wirey. Middle-ranked assassin. More importantly, Esme got an address of his second property: a lock-up in the Ashway row area: 82 Furnell St.
 

Furnell St


It was dark when the group approached the lock-up in the deserted unlit streets. It was a warehouse, with other lock-ups on each sides and at the back. Single storey, no windows, and one solid door.

Munch picked the lock, and that went to a small entrance way with a second door, which was covered in scratches and old blood.

Cody listened and heard panting. There was a hungry dog there but Tom managed to beguile it with food and water. This calmed the poor thing.

The inside of the building was mostly one room, but there was a second door next to the entrance door.

Zombie Dog


Through the second door, there was a fearsome undead rottweiler, which needed magical weapons to damage. Ardern managed to Turn it. 

When undead are turned, they will not approach the turning priest for several hours. (In this state, if the creature is damaged, the Turning power is lost - and the priest must roll again, thus it is better not to attack turned undead.) So, using her power, Ardern kept the zombie dog safely away from the group, allowing them to search the office that it was guarding.

Inside the office were three chests. The locks of all the chests were trapped with poison needles. Munch was the groups trap finder, but he wasn't very good today and managed to get several of the needles embedded into his skin, and even one under a fingernail, but with a bunch of Slow Poisons from Jack, Esme and Ardern and even one chancy Neutralize Poison (Ardern), plus some Find Traps spells, some reluctant Knock spells, all was well (apart from the agony Munch had to suffer), and the chests were all opened. 

Munch's bane
Munch's bane
One chest had 1000 silver pieces, another had 1000 gold pieces (1000 coins weighs 28kg), and one had nice clothing, plus a magic cloak and some magic slippers - bells on the toes.

When the search was complete, Ardern returned the zombie dog to its guard room, and Cody shut the door, safely locking the creature up again  - someone else's problem.


Pay-dirt



There was a trapdoor in floor of the main room. This went down to a small room via a ladder, and everyone descended.

Down here were some long trestle tables, a bunch of shelving on the walls with lots of vials, and many ingredients: barks herbs, 21 special herbs and spices. Some lanterns too. A Detect Magic revealed nothing glowing.

There was a desk here, strewn with papers. It was financial reports and bills of lading. Nothing very significant.

The desk had four drawers: Detect Traps  - top two drawers had traps

Rather than risk Munch's finger-nails again, Cody just blew the drawers open with a Knock spell. The only downside of this is that it will set off alarms and area-effect traps, and will destroy delicate potions. But it gets the job done.

Sure enough, in this case, the drawer contents were soaked in liquid, and the broken glass from two smashed vials.

"I bet they were Neutralize Poison potions," muttered Munch.

Unbroken inside, there was a silver letter-opener and a scroll too,  sealed with a wax seal - now broken.
Cody grabbed the scroll and opened it. The broken seal turned out to be a contact poison, but Cody shrugged it off. His own rashes and scabs more than compensated any stinging necrotic effects.

It was a letter from an Amelia Wilson to Da'Vid Moorn. Paraphrased:
Kill Vincent de Throak in this manner: 
Locate the Spear of the Barbarian Circle, and steal this spear, then see that it is delivered to Vincent de Throak. 
You may want to use gloves. 
The family will be very appreciative of this.

Detect Magic revealed that the silver letter-opener was magic, and the broken seal too.

Also here were the ownership papers of the Castrated Virgin

The group had what they had sought. So after a quick search of the walls (loose bricks revealed a tunnel to the sewers), they left the place - with the dog - and returned to the Sable Lilly

Return to Whisperers


Esme returned to Whisperer's Guild. Amelia Wilson was a valuable clue, so Esme wanted as much information as they could get on Wilson. So, she paid the Whisperer contact 1000gp and gave him the rest of the party's names. The information was duly delivered:

"Amelia Wilson is a retired member of the Sancho Wizards' Guild. She lives alone, in a small hamlet called Surrey - a day's journey out of Sancho. She is elderly. She is frail. She is not able to cause you issues, but she has friends - many many friends - in the Guild. She was popular. She had to retire. She was of unstable mind."

Cody immediately wrote to his WG patron Thespian back in Porn City, to update him with all this new information, but even with Gnome Post, this message would take a week to arrive and a second week to get an answer.

"I can tell you now what Thespian will say," said Cody, sullenly. "He will abuse me for being ugly, demand why we are taking so long, and demand we confront Miss Wilson to get a 'why'."

To tidy things up, Cody cast Identify on the three magical items:
  • The silver letter-opener can open any letter, and show its contents without disturbing it.
  • Boots of Stealth. +2 to stealth rolls
  • Cloak of Hiding - as per the Hide spell