Magnus and the Love Room

  Present:

• Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
• Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aquamarina from Porn City – Jamie
• Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
• MARMALADING Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
• Esmeralda "Ezme" Abernathy. Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
• Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
• MARMALADING Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
• Willow Woods. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
• Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
• Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl

 by Ian

One hour later at the Flabbergasted Radish our team have set themselves for the trap. Kippy, Munch and Ardern wake up in the room the group have booked out. They await opposite the trap in the 'Love room' that had all the appropriate Porn City equipment that any Soixante Neuf could use to maximum effect.

The waking characters don't have marmalade as the Wizard Guild had recently harvested it. Munch noted that the harvesting must have been aggressive as he had lost every hair on his body. 

Ezme waits at the bar and the group watch from the room window.

On time, Magnus eagerly strolls down the street and enters the Flabbergasted Radish. He spots Ezme at the bar and quickly sits next to her. With an excited glint in his eye, he orders drinks for both. "Have you got all your gear?" He asks.

"Oh, yes. I sure do" Ezme oozes. Ezme attached a leash to a collar Magnus had fitted and heads to the debauched room. 

Meanwhile in the party room, Willow decides to change into a mouse and wait in Cody's pocket. He has 30 minutes before bursting back to his usual immense human form. This should be ample time as Magnus seemed very keen. Just as Willow was panicking, 23 minutes later, Ezme and Magnus finally head to the room. 

Ezme easily persuades Magnus to be bound naked and gagged on the bed. He is fully bound and excited, when Ezme springs the trap by opening the door and signalling the rest of the party with the trigger word 'Enema!'.

Cody steps into the room and casts Sleep on the trapped Magnus, who at the time was wriggling and contorting in protest. He falls still.

"Good work. Now we can wake him up to question him!" 

First, the party double Magnus's bindings and put a dagger to his throat. Cast a Detect Magic and a ring he is wearing shows purple. They remove the gag and wake him.

Cody warns, spitting lice and boil pus ... "Keep quiet or you are dead! We have Speak with Dead so we will get the information we want - one way or the other. You chose to walk away or not. Tell us about the spear, who employed you and who you gave it to. NOW!!!!"

[Ezme rolled a '1' on Persuade. Magnus did not hold back!]

Magnus immediately grasps the seriousness of his situation and starts sharing the detail on spear recovery job he did. He accepted 2,000gp from the Thieves Guild to go and recover the spear from the wilderness. On returning to Porn City four weeks ago, he left a note at the Sweet Tangelo that he had the item and a meeting was arranged. A rich toff turned up to meet him (no idea on name). The toff was tall and wiry with a beautiful rapier sword. He wore extremely fine clothes and an elaborate waist-coat. He thought the guy was 'girly' and turned up with a man. They seemed to be more than business partners - if you get my drift. Gay as march hares was not far from the truth.

"If you promise to let me go, I can share more" Magnus offers.

"Sure," says Cody. "You have our word."

Magnus goes on to describe a scar and large birthmark the toff had AND a distinctive ring. The ring had a Horse bust. Cody immediately recognized the description as one of the emblems of the Thoak family (major Porn City family). Things just got more difficult for sure. He keeps this info from Magnus for now.

The group retreat to their room and leave Ezme on watch with the bound Magnus.

The party discuss next steps and what they might do. Ideas flow back and forward. 

Ezme deals with Magnus

Ten minutes later, they return to the room to discover that Ezme had dispatched Magnus. A death sentence for all the reprehensible treatment of previous priestesses, hoes and whores, being her dubious argument. Plus he was an assassin. His throat cut and multiple stab wounds to the chest - lucky for the drop-sheet and tarpaulin.

"Ok. I guess we now know what we are doing," someone observes wryly.

Knowing that the Porn City authorities do NOT like crime, especially of the murder kind, the party have to be very careful and a plan is hatched.

As Willow is a funeral director, he offers his services and knows exactly what needs to be done. There are hungry pigs in the Caribou Gorn Grove that are perfect to 'tidy this up'. He leaves to fetch his cart while the rest of the group figure out a way to get the body to the outside cart (when it arrives).

They obtain a sea chest that should be fine and bundle Magnus into it. Looks good.

Magnus's final ride

Cody puts on Magnus's clean clothes (he was naked when he was dispatched) and applies a Change Self spell to look kind of like Magnus. This change would never pass a reasonable inspection as Cody is simply too repulsive to look like Magnus. The idea is that it a passing glance would pass. Cody leaves the inn, walks up the street and disappears into a side alley where he returns to his revolting original form. He bundles Magnus's cloths into his backpack and returns to the inn.

The sea chest is brought through the inn and put into the cart, where Willow returns to the Grove. He pays the 100gp 'service fee', removes Magnus's gold teeth and Magnus is fed to the pigs with all his gear (minus the ring that the group recovered earlier).

Ania Report

With Cody at the lead, the group report back to Ania at the Wizards' Guild. They explain that the recipient of the spear was part of the Thoak family and untouchable. After describing the toff matching Magnus's description, Ania quickly identifies the person.

Ania informs, "Ahh. I see. Well that is Viscount Vincent de Thoak. He is somewhat on the outer of the family due to his sexual preferences, however IS STILL A THOAK. I don't care about him, but need that spear. But the Viscount MUST not die at your hands or you will all be the main attraction at IMAG's rituals".

Ania had no idea on his address or whereabouts. 

Spear Research

Everyone regroups and Ezme suggests some research into the magical spear. Willow managed to find reasonable info at the Grove from the Caribou Gorn elders. The spear is from the Elessari Circle mystical core of the barbarian tribes. The spear unites the tribes of Barbarians with its influence. It went missing months ago. Long before Magnus and his doomed crew's recent adventure to recover it.

Who is the Viscount Vincent de Thoak?

The party next turn to finding out more about the elusive Viscount. 

Vincent de Thoak

Cody tries the Wizards Guild and draws a blank.

Jack Jones decides to head to the docks and catch up with his salty sea dog mates. They might know something? He locates his old mate 'Jack' and they share a drink. After paying a small fee, (new) Jack agrees to dig deeper. 

Sometime later, the Jacks catch up and it turns out Salty Sea Dog Jack has good sources. The Viscount lives in the wealthy part of town on Fescue Av. An apartment not far from the Translucent Goat, but no idea on the apartment number.

Vincent is an avid follower of IMAG and extremely good with the rapier. He is know to frequent the gay bars with his boyfriend Sebastian. 

Fescue Avenue

The party gather their bits and pieces and head over to the rich part of town around Fescue Av. A foul smog surrounds the group and passers-by recoil with disgust. No, they have not been cursed or poisoned. This is how they normally look. People point and retch, covering their mouths and noses. Parents gather their children and run to safety. Dogs growl and bark, desperate to break free and protect their masters. All in a days work for our crew. Ezme travels off to one side.

Ezme enters the Translucent Goat and returns quickly. "You lot are not going to be able to go in there. Better stay out sorry."

The gang hang out on the street from this point on. Travelling in and out of the rich area as needed.

Our Jack returns to the new Jack and finds out that the Sebastian is a bit of a player and likes to fool around. Also likes to dabble in the IMAG and Arcane magics, making for a Mystic background.

Locate the Viscount

[The group pauses to distribute the recent magic items recovered.

+1 to hit longsword - Jack (Jamie)

+1 Dagger that ignores Armour - Munch (Darryl)

+3 Ring of Stealth (4x per day can add 3 to the base Stealth (HIS) stat) - Kippy (Ian)]

The party randomly loiter and look for Vincent but no sign of anyone that matches his description.

They decide to leave Munch and Kippy to take shifts looking for Viscount to identify Sebastian with the hope of using his infidelity as leverage to find out more about the Viscount and the Spear.

[Out of game there was widespread eye rolling and guffawing that we were looking for Sebastian, but had no description. However Kippy was always looking for Viscount Vincent and would assume the dude he was with was Sebastian. Not sure why the group thought otherwise? ]

Nothing. Over three or four days there was no sign of the Viscount. Kippy and Munch gave up. 

Ezme strolled into the Translucent Goat. Had a wine with a local who immediately identified the Viscount and knew that he lived at number 9 Fescue Avenue. That seemed a lot easier.

Stake out of Number 9

Bridge over the alley

Cody using his impressive Urban Survival noticed that Number 9 frontage had a back ally with a back door onto that ally. Also that Number 9 on the second level had an enclosed 'sky bridge' that crossed the ally and entered the building on the other side of the ally, on the second floor. 

The other building had a store frontage on the street level of Assure Boulevard. The store was 'Toys Galore' and filled with exactly what you are thinking. All manor of device, appendage and creams for personal use. The build also had a street level door to the alleyway. 

Cody enters the store to check things out and immediately the store keeper screams for him to piss off! While Cody stammers his defence, the shop keeper pulls out a crossbow and looses a bolt that just misses him. Cody beats a hasty retreat.

Ezme and Kippy enter the shop instead. The shop is the one room with a door that goes through to the back. Everything is very normal and nothing to report. 

Sebastian

Ezme returns to the Translucent Goat and decides to find out more about the elusive Sebastian. Where is he? Why are the Viscount and Sebastian not showing up?

Ezme finds a sympathetic ear in a local called Toby, that seemed instantly smitten. He mentions that he has not seen Sebastian for a while? 

Sebastian is easy to spot. He is 6ft 4 tall and ebony black as he is from the Pensive Isles. He notes that the couple at number 9 also have a butler called Arthur that tends the property.

Recon on Number 9

Munch, Cody, Kippy and Willow as a mouse in Kippy's pocket, decide to form an investigation party to go in. 

As the front doors are very busy streets - at any hour, they start in the alleyway and try the ground floor back door to number 9. Alas, the locks were impenetrable and foil the gang. As this is still rather open and they would lose the element of stealth and surprise, Cody resists the use of Knock to open the door.

They try the back door to the shop building. Success! The lock opens with a satisfying click and the party enter, locking the door behind them.

They carefully progress through the building looking for the stairs up. The building was generic and upstairs contained a large storeroom and adjoining office. No issues sneaking through and no sign of people. Detect Magic was cast in every room and nothing highlighted. 100gp was found in the office and the recon team pocket it.

They end up on the second floor at a substantial steel door that enters the sky bridge which bridges the alley-way across to the Viscount's house. Kippy and Munch check for traps and none discovered. Cody checks for magic and the entire door has a magical aura. Hmmmm, on second thoughts, the door did seem warm when we checked for traps?

Cody decides that it is worth a try of Dispel Magic and sets the spell off. Success!!! [Dispel Magic is a difficult skill check for Cody.]

The door is no longer magic, but it IS still locked. Munch tries the lock and it defeats him. Locks are not a Kippy thing, so Cody winds up using a Knock spell after all, and the door springs open. Relatively quiet and no harm done.

They cross the bridge and are met with another warm steel door. Sigh.

Cody tries a Dispel Magic and fumbles. The area ends up covered in a greasy goo for a few rounds. They wait for the effect to go and it eventually does.

Running very low on Power Points, Cody attempts a third Dispel Magic and this time a success!! The magic effect is gone. This time Munch disarms the lock and the group are free to enter the house.

Number 9 Search

The sky-bridge door opens to an office with a single exit to the main house. A search of the office does not reveal much of interest. The Viscount's dairy is found and the last entry was mundane and 4.5 weeks ago. No hint or sign that there was a trip ahead, nor mention of Spears and Gems?

Mouse Willow runs out of time and reforms to his normal vastness to explore in obese half-elf form. 

The office leads to an opulent boudoir. Seems clear this is Viscount Vincent's room. Its filled to the brim with fabulous clothing and all manor of bondage gear and equipment.

Moving though the house, quietly room by room, Cody continues to cast Detect Magics and all perform quick searches. Looking for either a person (seems clear no one is home based on the noise made so far and lack of reaction) nor the Spear or Gem. Any hint as to what happened to those would be ideal.

They enter another large bedroom on the second floor. Less opulent, but still of high quality. There is a very bad odour. Still in bed, there is a body. Inspection shows a cut throat and multiple stabs to the chest with a sharp object. 

The party have finally discovered Sebastian. Dead with his face somehow drained on one side. Oddly, while Willow is checking his teeth (no gold teeth this time), he notices Sebastian's tongue was inky black and not what is expected for a stab victim nor rotting corpse. Sebastian seems to have been dead for the four-ish weeks they have been missing.

The party move to the discovered stairs down and start searching the ground floor. They eventually enter a kitchen and discover the unfortunate butler, Arthur sitting at a chair. He too was partially drained and tongue was dark. Again been dead the same time.

With the entire ground floor initially searched, Cody [MND 17] notices that the house dimensions have a gap on the ground floor that would indicate a hidden cavity. They discover the secret door and open the cavity to discover stairs heading downward. 

They crew decide to be brave and press on for now, without summoning the rest of the group. Any hint of trouble and they will retreat.

The stairs lower to an underground room and in the middle of the floor is the sprawled body, in a bathrobe, of an obvious Viscount Vincent de Thoak. In his rotting outstretched hand is the spear with the inlaid gem the party need! Vincent has been significantly drained. There is a door that exits this room on the far side, away from the stairs. Vincent's spear hand is outstretched toward that door. 

The rest of the group is summoned. Cody wraps the Spear and places in his backpack. He felt a cold shudder even though he did not touch the spear directly [Cody saved vs Arcane thank goodness.]

Everyone assembled and discussed what to do next.  

1. Leave, hand in the Spear to Ania and return for the Search.
2. Leave and never come back (return spear).
3. Stay and explore right now (return spear later).

A vote is taken  the majority decided to stay and explore now....

(Kippy reminds everyone that the Spear should return to the Barbarian Council to restore order!)

Back to Porn City

 Present:

• Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
• Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aquamarina from Porn City – Jamie
• Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
• Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
• Esmeralda "Ezme" Abernathy. Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
• MARMALADING Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
• MARMALADING Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
• Willow Woods. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
• MARMALADING Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
• MARMALADING Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl

 by Andrew

The party had been on the Central Plains working for so-called Druid Ester, and had been sent to the Tower Autorock, one of the abandoned towers in the Porn City line of coast observation, to look for a magical spear. Beneath the tower they had found some suspicious recent foot-prints and followed them through an extensive tunnel system, and had passed through some one-way teleports. They were now not really sure where they were.

"Rainbow Fields" passage

Down a side tunnel, past a secret door, the passage was blocked by a glowing red field (Detect Magic revealed as such). Pushing a stick through the field burned it. No-one dared to put their hand through - yet(!)

Cody contemplated a Dispel Magic, but he was not too keen. [ Dispel magic is an Arcane 3 (third level) spell, and it is an opposed skill. His Arcane 3 skill value was not very high. ]

Down another passage was a locked door. Ezme tried to pick the lock and failed, so Grim tried, and he broke his pick off in the lock, hopelessly jammed [20 fumble].

Cody and Jack were low on magic, so each ate some magic tree bark and passed out into comas for 11 hours [the magic lone pine bark worked like holy wafer (for divine) and WG grapes (for arcane) - restores 2D4 magic points and takes 6+D6 hours]. Nothing happened during that time.

But soft! What sound through
yonder door murmurs?

Fully refreshed now, Cody approached the troublesome door and used a Knock spell on it - and blew it open.

There was a small short passage behind, with the same dusty footprints they were following, which came to another door.

Ezme did a Detect Traps. The spell didn't quite go as planned [fumble!] and the noise of an air-horn went off - for a full minute. The whole group (and Ezme) quickly withdrew back behind the secret door to the passage with the red field - the argument being that the secret door would shield the air-horn noise. 

This incident changed the mind of the party; they no-longer wanted to  follow the dusty footprints path, and returned to the tunnel with the red field ("Rainbow Fields" passage).

Jack bravely strode through the red field, and ZZZAPP!, got electrocuted [ 8 points ].

Grim, the duly appointed scout, went up ahead. Seventy paces on, there was an Orange field.

Cody volunteered and walked through this one. GZZZ-ZZZAAP! This was a bigger zap than the red one and it knocked him unconscious [ 13hp damage ]. Ezme and Jack brought him up again with magic cures.

Off went Grim again. Sixty or so paces later, a yellow field.

Tom's turn. A massive zap this time, but Tom managed to ground it [ made his Arcane save and took half damage of 8 hp ]

Off went Grim again. And now a green one.

This time the group heard footsteps coming the the passage beyond the green field - heavy boots and jingling armour. 

Retreat!

Cody cast Hide on Grim. [ Hide is our rules' version of Invisibility. It is a level 2 spell, and the recipient is only invisible if he does not move. The full moving-version is now level 3. ]

Two men in chainmail followed by a woman in velour passed Grim, as he wet himself.

The rest of the group retreated back to the original room past the secret door and set up an ambush in that room. [Editor: In hindsight, I don't actually know what we were intending to achieve with the hiding of Grim.]

The secret door opened a crack and a floating eyeball entered the room. Cody recognized the Wizard Eye spell - it meant the mage was a very powerful. Nevertheless, Cody cast Silence on the secret door. The fighters (Jack, Ezme and Tom) would have to fight in silence, but at least it would stop her spells.

But when the Silence spell ceased almost immediately, it was not a good omen. [Dispel Magic would do this.]

Ania Tilly

Ania Tilly

A woman's voice came through a gap, loud and authoritative "Drop your weapons and surrender. I am Ania Tilly."

It was probably serendipitous that Cody recognized that name from his time in the Porn City Wizards' Guild.  Had he not, and had the group fought, it would not have gone well.

"She's a Wizards' Guild nob," he hissed to the group. "Best we surrender."

Jack waved a white flag. The soldiers came through and disarmed everyone. No one put up any resistance.

"I recognize you," said Ania to Cody.

"Yes, miss," slurred Cody as he scratched a boil on his neck.

"Quite unforgettable. Junior mage. I heard you'd been exported from here."

"Our group got kidnapped by slavers. But we escaped."

"Why are you down here?"

"We tried to get back to Porn City, miss."

"You're in Porn City."

Pregnant pause.

"Oh! We did well, didn't we?!"

"How did you get here?"

"From the Snub, miss. The old Porn City lookout towers. The Annal passage, secret doors, one-way teleports, etc."

The whole group was marched back down the rainbow field passage. The invisible Grim wisely surrendered too. Then they were marched through a labyrinth of passages, tunnels and sewers all the way to the Porn City Wizards' Guild cellars. 

In the WG, they were all separated into cells, and questioned by Ania's subordinates. The party marmaladers were cleansed on the marmalade grille; their valuable marmalade would be harvested by the WG for its healing properties.

Cody did not hide anything back, and blabbed like a little tattle-tail bitch: all about the slaver trip to the Snub, the pirates, the islands, the Central Plains, the "druid" Ester and the Autorock tower, and the group they were following, and the magic spear, and all about his personal hygiene: giardia, lice, fleas, tape-worms, and hydatid cysts.

No-one else in the group hid anything in their questioning sessions either.

A couple of days passed. All were cured and all magic points restored. Grim got special visit from a WG-hired Panadeine priestess; she cured his latent (undead?) lycanthropy - a special ritual with heated mercury enemas and testicular injections of silver nitrate.

Ania's Job

After all this, Ania Tilly brought the whole group into a meeting room.

"I want you to find that person with the spear," she said. "I don't care if he's dead or alive, but I want that spear. Find it. The payment for all this is your freedom." 

The group hastily agreed.

"Another thing," she said. "That passage-way, with the dusty two-week-old footprints that you were following, before I found you, that passage comes out in the basement of a bordello in the city called The Golden Shower run by Broderick Vesper."

Ania returned all the party's gear and gave them 500gp to buy extra gear, and then released them onto the streets of Porn City. 

As Ezme wryly pointed out, "this could have been far worse."

Currently, the annual two-week-long Porn City holiday was running, called Cirque de la Vicieux (Circus of the Depraved).

Flabbergasted Radish

The group found lodgings: the Flabbergasted Radish - quite posh. The first investment of the Ania 500gp was two 100gp gems which were required for Identify spells, which Cody then cast on the party's magic items: the dagger and long sword.

The long sword was +1 to hit. The dagger ignores armour.

Tom bought a big shield, and Jack got Tom's small shield. Some of the group bought some off-the-shelf studded-leather armour.

Golden Shower

The newly-equipped group then headed to the Golden Shower - a two storey stone building near the Porn City docks - and went inside.

Ralph

Ezme went to interview the place's madame. She was introduced to Ralph - a 'they/them'.

Tom hired a whore called Anne. Cody got whore Sara. Grim seduced Ethyl Aarvark. And Jack's whore was Philomena, who, like Aquamarina Temple-Fighter Jack, was into water sports.

Ezme's talk with Ralph, Adam's apple and all, was not very fruitful. They knew nothing or were very tight-lipped, despite being offered money. 

Tom successfully intimidated Anne.

"Something happened," she yelped as the paddle struck home. "A week ago there was a loud noise down stairs in the basement. Don't know what it was. Sounded like something out of a brass band. Couple of the boys went downstairs to check it out."

This was obviously the moment when Ezme's Detect Traps spell failed with the loud air-horn sound.

Cody's lack of basic hygiene managed to disgust his whore Sara, so she fled the room and ended up being consoled by Ezme. Sara had a tale too: "I saw something unusual a few weeks ago. A man came out of the basement. Looking disheveled. Upstairs. Had a spear head. Big gem on it. Big strawberry birthmark on his face. Tossed a bag to Ralph. Then bolted outside."

No one was brave enough to question Ralph again.

Magnus Digby

The party withdrew to the Flabbergasted Radish to plot and scheme.

Cody went to the WG. Nothing there about anyone with such a distinctive birthmark.

Magnus Digby

Jack went to visit his seamen mates down on the docks (near the Aquamarina temple) to ask about the strawberry birthmark guy. One of the old salts knew him as Magnus Digby. He was a member of the Porn City Thieves Guild, and they suspected he was an assassin - and a womanizer. He lived in a boarding house near docks called The Hermitage on Savoy Street.

So, Grim disguised himself to be an alky. He got a room at the Hermitage. It was a ramshackle two-storey place, red velour curtains, an elderly woman proprietor behind the counter, fearsome Vera Duckworth. The bedrooms were upstairs, downstairs was the dining room, kitchen and ablutions.

She offered Grim private room number five for 5 gp per night, or he could stay in the shared common room for 1 gp per night. Guests must pay a week in advance and must be in by 8 be'light [11pm] every night. 

"If you're not in the room by them," Vera said tersely. "You lose the room. No fightin'. Dinner at dark. No weapons. No problems."

So Grim took a room.

That evening, Grim sat down with eleven other lodgers to have the evening meal at the Hermitage. A guy with a strawberry birthmark was there - Magnus Digby himself! Plus his two mates Joshua Spandex, a pit-fighter, and Curtis Dronk, a suspected tea-leaf. Magnus Digby had cold eyes, cold like a fish, but he claimed to be a womanizer. Grim managed to wheedle out their room numbers too: 2 for Magnus, 3 for Dronk and 4 for Spandex.

The next day, at the Flabbergasted Radish, Grim updated the group, and so they schemed. Cody suggested Ezme distract Magnus with her Soixante Neuf feminine wiles while some of the group break in to Digby's room to see if the magic spear was hidden there, but Grim was utterly terrified of Vera Duckworth and did not want to break any rules of the Hermitage. Breaking into other guests' rooms is strictly against the rules, of course. 

So, instead, a more-dangerous plan was hatched to capture Magnus Digby and interrogate him. Ezme would seduce and lure him to a prearranged room at the Flabbergasted Radish. Here, Cody would burst into this room and attempt a Sleep spell, and Fat Willow a Command spell, with martial support from Tom and Jack (and Ezme) if that failed.

So, Grim returned to the Hermitage that evening and spent the night. In the morning, over breakfast, Grim hooked up with Digby and regaled the pleasures of a 69 whore "Jaqueline" (Ezme) that he knew. Digby's interest was piqued and he wanted to meet her.

Ezme's Rendezvous

Noon at the Green Pickle was the arranged rendezvous.

Ezme all dolled-up for Magnus

Ezme was sat at a table in the inn. Grim and Magnus arrived and Grim gestured Magnus over to Ezme/Jaqueline.

"I understand that you are interested in worshipping Soixante Neuf?" Ezme said with a little smile. 

"Yes I am," replied Magnus. "I am thinking about converting to Soixante Neuf. I heard its a very meaningful religion." 

"I've heard that before," said Ezme. snorting at the cliche.

"Have you? But this is true. From the depth of my heart..."

"Here's the deal. I understand that Jack gave you the impression that I would be willing to do this for free."

"What he said was that you Soixante Neuf bitches, uh - I mean women - take us to worship. And that is how you convert us. And that you do that for free. Because it is another soul to god."

"Really?" said Ezme. "I've asked around about you, my friend..."

"... And you'd have learnt that I have the purest of souls," interrupted Magnus.

"Here's how it's gonna work. If you want to worship with me, you'd better pay out some money. I don't expect a lot. I am fulfilling my duties."

"Like a donation... to the greater good?"

"Of course," said Ezme.

"That you will hand over to your church, of course."

"Of course."

Magnus's eyes showed no emotion at all, but he nodded assent. Then he started again.

"If by chance, you know, if things don't happen for me. Sometimes that's been a problem after I got ... cut there." He made a gesture to his groin. "So, I like to use an instrument. Is that okay?"

"I would have to see said instrument," said Ezme. "To be honest, I would be surprised if things didn't happen for you. I would count that as a personal failure."

Ezme got up to leave.

"So, meet me at the Flabbergasted Radish in one hour."

"Have you got a tarpaulin and a drop sheet?" asked Magnus.

Ezme blinked notably, then hurriedly confirmed this - she would have to swing past the Soixante Neuf temple on the way to the Radish to pick up said items.

"I'll bring my instruments," said Magnus. "Just in case."

The Dark

  Present:

• Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
• Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aqua Marina from Porn City – Jamie
• Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
• Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
• Esmeralda "Ezme" Abernathy. Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
• MARMALADING: Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
• MARMALADING: Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
• (part) MARMALADING Willow Woods. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
• Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
• MARMALADING: Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl

by Jeff

The pillar of greasy black smoke from the burnt bodies of the barbarians we had found at the old ruins was quickly shredded apart by the cold winds that were constantly blowing across the plains. The broken wooden door to the intact stone building was banging in the wind, but we didn't look back as we left that accursed place.

Thoughts and eyes directed forward, towards the distant coast and the mysterious tower of Autorock, the party pushed on into the face of the winds. The plains were mist covered, with a constant drizzle driving into their faces and settling over them. The landscape was barren and constant with no distinguishing features to mark direction of progress. But Cody knew the way.

"Off there is Klib" Cody stated with certainty, "So we go ... there"

Pointing ahead into the miserable grey, Cody led the party on.

Later that day a rough campsite was located and set up for the night. A cold meal was eaten and the watches for the night were assigned. Huddling down behind a few boulders, they prepared for another miserable night in the unceasing wind and cold damp conditions.

Nothing happened!

The next day arrived, Real's light beaming down over the sparkling coastal landscape. No winds blew, no rain was falling, no mists filled the hollows. The blue of the ocean could be seen ahead, and the vibrant green of the plains stretched out in all directions.

"That's not good" muttered Kippy.

The Tower

But it was. The party packed up with a spring in their step and a smile on their faces and moved on towards the coast. Pretty soon the shape of a stone tower jutting up from a rocky promontory was spotted ahead. While the bulk of the party sheltered in a small dip in the landscape, Cody, Grim, and Kippy were sent forward towards the tower on a reconnaissance mission.

After slipping off towards the tower, they disappeared from sight amongst the low scrub.

Half an hour later, Cody was spotted standing by the base of the tower, beckoning calmly, so the party moved up. Joining the three scouts at the base of the tower, Kippy gave a brief report.

"Stone tower, four storeys, no windows, arrow slots each level, crenelations around the top, lots of vines, wicked looking thorns, one steel banded wooden door, no magic detected, no sign of watchers or guards, haven't gone in"

Kippy cautiously approached the door.

"Hey" he whispered, "It's not even closed"

Kippy gave a light push and the door swung open. The ground floor level of the tower consisted of a single open circular room, a spiral stair winding up around the outside wall to the right and winding down to the left. The stone floor was bare, but the walls were adorned with a series of four mounted heads, equally spaced around the walls. There was a Bison, Gnoll, Human, and Wolf head, each one mounted on a carved wooden backboard and all of them staring down towards the centre of the room.

"Trophies?" wondered Kippy with a gulp.

With no obvious threat apparent, although Kippy did feel that he was being watched, the rest of the party entered behind him. Cody cast a Detect Magic spell (nothing), and then Kippy made his way stealthily up the spiral stair towards the next level.

Kippy approached the first-floor level and immediately noticed a body slumped over the top steps. A long dead skeletal figure, dressed in old, tattered leather armour and clutching a sharp looking long sword in its right hand was sprawled at the stair landing. The room at this first-floor level was obviously an old kitchen/dining/living space, but long disused. Dust covered everything, apart from a large brownish stained area around the body. Kippy noted that the stain looked like it had once pooled and flowed down the top steps. "Old blood" he surmised, "Yuk". Leaning forward Kippy picked up the long sword, gave it a testing swing, and entered the room. 

Meanwhile, back at the ground floor, Jack had undertaken a perfunctory search around the walls (no secret doors or chambers were found), followed by an investigation of the four trophy heads. It was at the Bison head where Jacks touch caused a small puff of yellow dust to billow out from the Bison's fur and settled over Jack's hands and face.

With a cough and a splutter, Jack dropped back to the ground mumbling.

"Damn " he complained, "That's a bitter smelling du sss  t ...."  

His complaints fading out to silence, Jack dropped to the floor below the Bison head, unconscious.

"Damn" complained Ezme in turn, rushing over to cast a Slow Poison spell.

Which proved very successful, as Jack groaned and sat up with a glazed look.

[The strange poison caused four points of damage, burning down Jack's throat and into his lungs]

Ezme made two unsuccessful attempts to cast Cure Poison [a level two Divine spell, with Ezme's skill at only seven, and costing Ezme a total of four magic points to no effect] before giving up.

Then Kippy popped back the stairs waving an old sword and suggesting that everyone move up to the first floor before he continued up to check out the second level. Which we did.

Cody cast another Detect Magic spell at the first-floor level, revealing that the long sword that Kippy had recovered from the body was in fact magic.

"Can anyone else use these things?" asked Kippy.

It turned out that Jack was the most experienced with the long sword, so he reluctantly received the blade and joined Kippy at the stair before they both cautiously moved up towards the second floor.

"Didn't help that guy much" muttered Jack, pointing at the dead body of the sword's previous owner.

Jack led the way, the new magic sword stretched out before him, Kippy directly behind. Both moved absolutely silently as they made their way around the wall and up the spiral stair toward the opening to level two above.

The bunkroom

Another skeletal body was slumped at the top of this flight of stairs too, no weapons this time though, but just as dead and ancient as the first one. This level was obviously a bunk room; six sets of bunks were spaced across the floor. A number of dead bodies (only skeletons were left, so it some time ago) were also found in the bunks, dry blood-stained sheets bunched up below the old corpses.

"What happened here?" wondered Jack, hoping that the bodies weren't going to leap up and attack him in some mass undead retribution orgy. Keeping a wary eye on the room, and each of the bodies, Jack kept watch while Kippy slipped up the stairs to the final level, a storeroom.

Again, a skeletal body was sprawled at the top of the stairs; old, dried blood trails pooling around the body and dripping down the stairs. A few old dusty barrels and cartons were stacked around the room, and a set of rusty metal rungs lead up to a trapdoor in the ceiling. Kippy checked out the trapdoor, unbolted it, and popped out onto the roof. A fixed telescope was mounted between the crenelations facing out to the sea, and although the view was nice, there was nothing specific to see. Kippy did note that there was a lot of guano all over the roof, the crenelations, the telescope, and in fact, everywhere, including some very large and solid looking deposits.

"Wooh" Kippy thought, "I wouldn't want to meet the bird that laid that log!"

With a nervous glance around, Kippy slipped back through the trapdoor, locking it firmly behind him, and scuttled down to the storeroom floor. Gathering Jack as he passed, they both descended back to the rest of the party, and a slightly more thorough search was undertaken.

Detect Magic's revealed nothing exciting, although Cody did note that one of the barrels in the storeroom contained a well-aged whiskey, and two of the other barrels contained oil. Also harvested from the stores was a sturdy length of good climbing rope and a decent small shield which Tom excitedly claimed. Then it was back to the ground floor where the staircase also descended downward into a dark underground space.

Kippy slipped down the stairs for a recce and was soon back with a report.

"Some kind of dungeon apparently, all kitted out with a torture table, complete with obligatory skeletal body, plenty of torture equipment, and five small cells around the perimeter" Kippy noted.

"But I got a bad feeling down there" continued Kippy, " The hairs on my neck all rose up!"

Jack led the way with his new magic sword, the rest of the party trailing.

The stair spiralled down and soon deposited the party into the torture chamber. 

Cody cast a Detect Magic, which was negative, and Kippy pointed out some tracks.

"Look, some footprints lead around the room to the cells" Kippy exclaimed.

Kippy moved silently across the basement floor, slipped around the torture table and body, and approached the cells. The doors were wooden, but metal strapped, and three of them hung open. Small, barred windows allowed a look inside, and Kippy's lantern light sliced across each window in turn.

"CLANGGG" rang out from one of the closed doors, as a terrifying shape lurched suddenly out of the darkness of the cell and threw itself at the bars in the window. A stinking breath of air blew from the window as spittle rained down around Kippy from the creatures horrific hissing.

"Creeeeeak" went one of the open cell doors, as it slowly started to swing outwards. "BOOM" went another, as it smashed open against the stone wall, two hideous creatures lurching quickly out of the door and charging at Kippy, who squealed and leapt back behind Jack and retreated to the stairs where he could get a decent arrow shot.

"Zombies, thanks heaps" groaned Jack sarcastically as he squared off against them.

Kippy missed, his arrow clattering across the room ineffectively. Ezme had also backed up and drawn her bow, a silver tipped arrow momentarily poised across the quivering bowstring and then flying straight and true into the lead Zombie's throat. Cody's Magic Missile fizzed out on his finger, but Jack's new magic long sword hacked into the foul creature, and it dropped to the floor in a heap.

The second zombie lurched over the slumped body of its fallen comrade and threw itself at Jack. 

A second wave of arrows flew from Kippy and Ezme, Ezme's silver tipped arrow missing, tearing through the small gap between Jack and the zombie, but Kippy's arrow speared straight through the zombie's chest. Unfortunately, it didn't appear to do any damage whatsoever!

Cody's second Magic Missile attempt also fizzled out, and this time the zombie's clawed fingers cut across Jack's arm, drawing blood. 

Hissing in pain, Jack braced himself for the next attack, swinging his magic long sword at the creature's chest, successfully this time, and Cody's Magic Missile also launched from his finger and struck the creature unerringly in its sightless eye.

Another successful round of attacks from Cody and Jack saw the zombie dispatched. And just to be absolutely sure, the two bodies were dosed with oil from one of the barrels and set alight. 

[Jamie's Poison Defence roll following the zombie's successful attack had failed, and his wound was stinging something awful]

Retreating from the smoke, and other potential undead attacks, the party exited the tower. Jack drank one of the Potions of Healing and stood under REAL's light (the sun) for a time. His scratches healed up following the potion, but it continued to sting a little, and traces of red infection remained.

It was decided that the party would rest up in the tower storeroom for the night, Jack and Ezme taking doses of the magic White Pine bark to assist them recover their magical power. 

During Grim's watch overnight, he heard load crashing and scraping claw noises from the roof but didn't bother to wake the rest of the party and reported the disturbance to the rest in the morning.

Jack was surprised that he hadn't recovered any power after his magically supported sleep, but he did note that he felt much better. Ezme was restored to full power.

After a decent breakfast, the party made their way back down into the basement torture chamber and carried out a thorough search of the three open, and now empty, cells. The first creature we had encountered was still present in the closed cell, hissing and spitting at the party as they passed. 

Success, a secret door was located in the first cell. Kippy undertook a check for Traps, finding nothing, and opened the door. A smooth and man-made passage led off into the darkness. As Kippy's lantern beam speared the darkness, a slumped form was revealed about thirty feet away down the passage, beyond which the passage turned towards the right, with nothing visible. 

Cautiously approaching the body, the party carried out an inspection.

"Porn City" noted Cody, "He is Cercle des Vicieux, from the Wicked Circle"

But he wasn't wicked anymore, definitely deceased, maybe two weeks ago, his face unnaturally sunken in around the skull, his skin dry and desiccated and flaking off as he was prodded. Even his purse was gone, artfully cut from his belt tie by an expert.

"One down then" noted Ezme, "Let's go"

But around the corner was pitch blackness. A solid wall of darkness across the passage that Kippy's lantern couldn't penetrate. Kippy stopped and looked to Cody.

Cody cast a Light spell.

"BOOM" 

A solid beam of darkness erupted from the Dark and struck Cody in the chest, throwing him back across the passage and into the wall, where he groaned and slumped to the floor.

"Ouch" he mumbled, "That's not natural"

[The Light spell had triggered a Divine reaction, dealing six points of damage to Cody]  

"IMAG?" postulated Ezme.

"We definitely can't continue then" complained Jack.

"Well" stated Tom, "The other three must have gone that way" and stepped forward into the Darkness.

"Shit" muttered Jack and bravely followed.

Then everyone piled through the Darkness, one after the other.

On the other side was a circular chamber, and definitely a shrine or temple to IMAG.

A black alabaster sacrificial table took centre place in the chamber, six blood channels running to a drainage penetration in the centre. The circular shiny black wall was symmetrically adorned with six strange hemispheres of Darkness, about a metre in diameter, bulging out from the wall. Between each of the hemispheres were a series of disturbing etchings carved into the black stone.

"Don't look at those" warned Ezme, but it was too late.

Cody had wandered over and peered at the closest etching. His body stiffened, his eyes dilating, then he shuddered violently and screamed. Spinning on the spot, Cody turned to the circle of Dark marking the passage they had entered through and sprinted straight out with a scream of terror.

[Andrew had failed his Divine Defence roll, witnessed unimaginable scenes of debauchery and violence, and been overwhelmed with fear. The duration wasn't particularly long though, and Cody was soon back with the rest of the party, albeit with a sheepish grimace on his face]

"Don't look at those" agreed Cody on his return.

Tom was gesturing at the Black hemispheres.

"They are the only thing here" Tom suggested, "Let's just check inside them"

"NO, don't touch them" warned Ezme.

But it was too late. Tom had thrust his hand into the centre of the Dark hemisphere, up to his elbow, and was attempting to locate whatever was on the wall generating the Darkness.

"It's a bit cold" he said, "And I can't even feel the wall here"

"I think there is a tunnel back here" concluded Tom, "Let's try the others"

And before anyone could stop him, Tom had wandered part way around the room, thrusting his arm into each of the hemispheres in turn.

"All the sa...." he began, but he was cut off mid-sentence at the fourth hemisphere. As soon as his finger touched the surface there was a loud "POP" and Tom disappeared.

"Shit" muttered Jack and bravely followed.

[There is a standing party protocol wherein if someone is transported by a magical portal to an unknown location, then the rest of the party decides whether to all follow, or to abandon the hapless sucker to their fate. In 90% of cases, we all follow, and so it is an easy way to end up with a TPK.  In this case, everyone popped through, one after the other, following Tom into the Dark.]

The party were transported into some type of small mausoleum, a rectangular room with an exit opposite the arrival point. Rows of ancient cadavers lined each side of the room, and a much more recent human body lay in the centre of the room. This body looked to be only two weeks' dead, some type of fighter dressed in chainmail armour, clutching a long sword, with a dagger sheathed on his belt. His money purse was also gone, just like the other human body we had encountered.

"Two down then" noted Ezme, "What's next?"

"A Detect Magic" declared Cody, "That's what"

And just like that the party had another magical weapon, the dagger from the body. Since only Grim could effectively use a dagger, he was handed the weapon.

"Front line" chuckled Jack, happy to now not be the only wielder of magic weapons.

There was another Dark hemisphere behind them, where they had arrived, so testing the exit options was decided upon. Cody tentatively reached out to tough the surface of the Dark, and "POP", gone.

Everyone followed and found themselves back in the IMAG room. There were two Dark hemispheres that hadn't been investigated, so that occurred. All similar hidden shafts like the first one previously tested, with no other magical portals.

Grim decided that he should squeeze his way into one of these hidden shafts to see where they went, so he clambered up the wall and crawled into the Darkness. 

"It's pitch black" he reported, "But goes forward a li...."

His sentence was cut off by a surprised squeal, then a clattering thump.

"Ooof" grunted Grim from within the Dark hemisphere, "There's a vertical drop here, about eight feet"

"And it's still pitch black" he continued, "The ground is covered with crunchy stuff, and there is a wall"

"Ouch" called Grim, "Something hit me"

Grim wildly swung his magical dagger in the general direction of the scratching noises he heard but struck nothing. Then he realized he could hear quite a lot of scratching noises, from all around, and leapt for the wall below where he thought the shaft he had fallen from was. As he scrambled his way back up the wall, he received a number of blows to his legs, and something had grasped hold and wouldn't let go. Clambering quickly back up the pitch-black shaft, Grim soon tumbled through the Dark hemisphere and into the IMAG room, a skeletal arm gripping tightly to his lower leg.

"Get it off" he screamed, "Get it off"

But it wasn't moving and was able to be easily prised off. Cody tossed it back through the Dark hemisphere, and it clattered away down the hidden shaft back into its ossuary.

"Let's get out of here" shivered Grim, and the party all popped back into the mausoleum.

Moving across the room, between all the desiccated cadavers, past the dead fighter, and into the only exit, the party pushed on along a gloomy passage. They soon encountered a third human body, about two weeks dead and similarly drained like the previous two. This one was wearing a suit of leather armour which on close inspection looked to fit Kippy perfectly [Courtesy of a successful Luck roll]. Kippy spent a few minutes stripping the armour off the body, noting in passing that his money-purse had also been cut off and removed.

"Three down then" noted Ezme, "Looks like only a thief is left"

The passage then opened out into a large double chambered cavern.

Cody, who could visualise in 3D, noted the room looked like someone's fat arse so it was immediately dubbed the Buttock Cavern. And it was pretty dark in there!

But not dark enough to mask the even darker wispy silhouette of a floating figure that was gliding straight towards the party. Waves of "evil" were emanating from the figure, and the temperature suddenly dropped.

"Shit" muttered Jack and bravely stepped forward with his magical weapon.

Grim also stepped forward with his new magic dagger, and even Tom inched forwards with his club and newly found shield.

Three rounds later, the evil wispy creature was dispatched with a POP. Well, it disappeared anyway which was as good as killing it as far as Grim and Jack were concerned.

[The fight was accelerated and over in only three rounds as a result of a Critical hit by Jack, dealing a massive 11 points of damage and causing the creature to lose its next attack. Tom's attacks did no damage whatsoever, and Cody did manage to get a few Magic Missiles into it as well]

While the short battle was taking place, Willow and Ezme had paused to admire a piece of artwork that was etched on the wall. It had a few button-like shapes placed over what looked to be a woman's sexual organs, and Ezme reached out to brush her hand across the apparent butt-plug.

"POP" and Ezme immediately vanished from the room. Willow was quite startled, but no one else noticed, until the fight was over and Willow described what had happened.

The artwork was revealed to be magical (Cody's Detect magic spell) and Tom was the first to respond this time. Stabbing his hand at the butt-plug, he disappeared, and everyone else followed.

The party appeared in a small brick lined room, about four metres square. It was obviously old and was covered in a thin layer of dust and cobwebs. A lone set of tracks led across the room to a solid, and securely locked, door. This was the only apparent exit because there was nothing behind us, no way to get back to the Buttock Cavern. 

Cody was very excited that the party had arrived, wherever it was that they had arrived to, and gave Ezme a long and deep kiss on the mouth, with tongue!

"Gross" yelled Ezme, shoving him off.

Kippy examined the locked door while Tom ran his eye over the four walls, noticing a small door shaped outline hidden on the brickwork. A secret door!

A narrow brick lined passage led off into the distance, the party followed, Kippy leading the way.

After about sixty metres, Kippy spotted a slight red shimmer across the passage and halted the party. Cody Detected a magical field.

Continue on through the magical field?

Return to the locked door?

What was the party to do?

Battle on the Hill

Present:

• Cody Dieback. Human Male Wizard from Highport – Andrew
• MARMALADING Jack "Blocker" Jones. Human Male Temple Fighter of Aquamarina from Porn City – Jamie
• Tom Eade. Human Male Fighter from Porn City – Jeff
• Grim Hand. Human Male Rogue from Porn City – Jason
• Esmeralda "Ezme" Abernathy. Human Female Temple Fighter of Soixante Neuf from Scabport – Shane
• Ardern. Human Female Priestess of Mr Quail from Porn City – Kevin
• Rock Hammer. Human Male Barbarian from Central Plains – Steven
• Willow Woods. Half-elf Male Caribou Gorn Priest from Porn City - Chris
• Kippy Hunt. Human Male Barbarian of the Central Plains – Ian
• MARMALADING Munch Ease. Human Male Thief from Porn City – Darryl

 by Jason

 

Battle on the hill

As you’ll recall, I (Grim) was down in the caves looking for the boy as several goblins and

a human ran up the hill to engage the bulk of our party. Just outside and above the cave

entrance, Jack had succumbed to marmalade. Rock, in the same spot, waited half a

minute before pursuing the goblins.

Up the hill, the party had barely survived its own ambush attempt on a human-led goblin

group that they’d spotted coming from the opposite direction (an exit from the cave system

over the ridge giving access to a stream). The human fighter and several goblins now lay

dead around them. Munch had fallen, while a fresh Ardern wiped the marmalade aside and

appeared from the bushes.

The party now had less than a minute to prepare for the second goblin group coming up

the hill from the main cave entrance. They did their best to apply first aid and healing and

got ready to do it all again. Some had a few seconds to find cover to hide behind.

Unspoken were the shared thoughts of certain death. But they stood to fight anyway.

These heroes, whose achievements I am sure will one day be put to song, included Kip,

Willow, Cody, Ezme, Ardern and Tom.

The enemy engaged. Kip (on 1HP) faced two goblins; Willow (fresh) faced two goblins;

Cody and Ezme faced another two of the vermin. Meanwhile, Tom had succeeded in

concealing himself and prepared to attack the tough-looking human from behind.

The melee went something like this:

• Kip takes a goblin down with arrow
• Tom does 9 on the human from behind (armour stopped 2)
• Ezme chops a goblin head off with double handed sword
• Kip hits second goblin with sword for 5
• Willow misses hers, is hit for 4
• Ardern casts armour on self
• Tom does another 5 on the human – kills him
• Ezme kills hers
• Goblin fighting Kip fumbles, weapon locked with opponent, both lose next attack
• Willow takes a hit and falls unconscious

The fates had intervened and the battle’s fortunes turned. Just three goblins were left, two

on Ezme, one on Kip:

• Ezme hit for a kill and was missed by both opponents
• Ardern went to aid Kit, finishing off the wounded goblin
• Ezme takes out the last one goblin
• Tom rushes in after killing the human, but isn’t needed.

The battle was over and won.

After

Rock entered the clearing, panting after his run up the hill, frothing at the mouth and

looking for something to kill. The space was almost silent, lit only by the gurgling deaths of

the enemy. Rock pivoted, applying first aid to Willow, bringing him back to consciousness.

Ardern gave further healing to Willow, Tom and Kip.

A search was done of the dead humans:

- 2 x studded leather armour and 2H swords.

- 2 x quivers with silver tipped arrows

- no valuables on them

Rock explained Grim’s whereabouts and the group trod carefully back down the slope to

the cave entrance. Just as they got there, Grim came out with the dead boy – dead for

days, he said, before they got any ideas. Indeed, the blood in the bucket that had been

collected under the body was found to be congealed and dark.

Unsure whether there were yet more of the vermin requiring extermination, we crept

quietly into the cave, with Grim and Kip (with lantern) in the lead. We went past the

kitchen, sleeping room and prison room I’d scouted earlier. We heard water down a

passage to the left and there was a very (goblin-sized) small tunnel to the right.

Kip and I squeezed into the crevice, expecting any time to be ambushed in this impossibly

tight space. But it went on and on, and up. Which led us all to take the risk of continuing.

Eventually, after maybe 200m we emerged at the crater rim, not far from our vantage point

earlier in the day. Clearly, had we not attacked proactively during the day, there was a high

chance goblin scouts would have found us in the night.

We returned overland to the cave entrance to explore the left tunnel. This led to a chamber

with two human-sized sleeping mats and a few possessions. The chamber faced direct to

a rock ledge with a stream bubbling through to the outdoors. Presumably the route the first

group of goblins had taken to attack the party from behind, on the hill.

In the chamber we found travelling kits, an old, ornate sword hilt broken at three inches,

small bags with 400gp, three ceramic vials and three clear vials with red liquid in them

(corked/half full). Ardern identified the ceramic vials as 2D4 healings. We weren’t sure

about the red ones, they didn’t appear magical.

We decided to camp in the humans’ cave as it was nearly nightfall. Cody, Willow, Ezme and

Ardern managed to rest up and the others kept watch. To enable this we did two shifts of

two: Kip & Tom; and Grim and Rock. No more goblins appeared. The night passed without

concern.

In the morning, we attempted some more healings with little success. Cody detected slight

magic on sword hilt we had found.

We started the trek back to our job master, carrying the boy’s body. Our night watches

swapped to Grim/Tom; and Rock/Cody as we tried desperately to get some more magic

points across the party. That night was fortunately uneventful and allowed some more

healing – Ardern on Kip (6), Ardern on Ezme and Kip.

Standing Stones Base

The next morning, after an hour or so travelling, we saw the wolves again and soon after that, we make it to the standing stones and Ester the blind druid.

The druid was unhappy about the state of the dead boy – saying she needed fresh blood, not congealed. We realized she didn’t care about the welfare of the boy at all, just his blood. Geez, we carried that body for miles for no reason! The druid was very perceptive in her questioning of us and interested in the vials of red liquid we’d found. It turned out the vials contained fresh blood. The druid did a taste test and seemed relieved. She said she’d use one in the evening.

We were made welcome to stay the day (resting) until the evening. During this time, the cooking fire grew. At nightfall, the druid grew the fire further and threw in the blood from a vial. Our spell users felt a tingling. Cody even saw shapes and a woman’s face in the flames for a flash. Then the fire calmed down. The rest of us felt like minions in someone else’s plan.

Ester the Druid

After the above ceremony, the druid said she had another task for us. 

“I need an item, a short spear of some importance to me. I have seen four men go into the tower of Autorock. They are the ones who killed the boy and they have knowledge of the spear.”

On further questioning, we learned Autorock was one of four towers once built by Porn city as a rather unsuccessful defence line. The tower faces the sea. It is rumoured the tower was built to defend the Annal Passage – if you like, a back passage to Porn City. The tower is thus also the short-cut we seek to get home. The spear the druid wants was a relic looked after by the Elessari Circle governing the barbarian lands. It has a gem in the hilt.

Tom asked about the sword hilt we found. It turned out this was another relic of the Elessari Circle that the druid has been sent by them to find. We agreed to leave the hilt with the druid for information about where the sword blade was.

New Job

There was some discussion in the party about why this new quest was a fair deal given we’d already carried out the task that supposed to give us the shortcut to Porn City. But the muttering quietened when the magic users were bought off with small bags of fine, white coloured bark – which apparently acts like the wafer Ezme and Ardern use for getting back their spells.

We were told it would take a good ten days to get to the tower.

So we agreed to do it, given the quest and our desire to get home faster seemed to coincide.

That night we slept under the protection of the hollow. Spell casters got a D4 +2 magic points back. No watches needed. Grim overheard some discussion among 2-3 party members about the wisdom of the approach taken against the goblins in the cave system. He didn’t hear everything, but distinctly picked up the words, “military genius.” It gave him a warm feeling knowing his powers of persuasion had been put to good use.

Next morning we headed off. The first day and night were uneventful. On day two, we got to a relatively wide river (40m) that we had to cross. It was the braided style, quite rapid, about knee deep but probably with holes and dangerous bits. Kip used his survival knowledge to rope us together, using poles to cross. The strong party members helped the weak. It was a successful crossing.

That night Willow and Kip rested again to get to near full strength. The third day and night went well also. Everyone was now back to full strength except Cody and Ardern.

On day four things were going well until we heard the roar of hooves and saw a dust cloud coming towards us. A massive herd of bison were running our way. Kip advised us to find a small rise and form a circle. The bison got real close but missed us. Those outdoor survival skills were proving really useful – who knew?!

On the night of day five, Rock and Willow were on watch when there was a close howling of a lone wolf. It then went quiet but Willow could see a large wolf at the edge of his infravision and medium bow range. Willow decided to wake the fighters while scanning around for other threats. The wolf stopped, started sniffing and then charged toward the party.

Willow tried to cast light on a stone to make the wolf visible to the party but failed. Kip got his small lantern out – spotlighting the speeding wolf. We could see it was already bleeding and clearly injured. It went for Tom, who’d kindly stepped out in front. It missed, but we were horrified to see its bulk – it was as tall as Tom’s shoulders while standing on its legs.

Melee:

• Willow tried charm animal – it didn’t work. Must be magical, he says.
• Rock narrowly missed the beast
• Ezme did 7 damage
• Tom was hit and took 10 damage
• Wolf gets into second row of us and goes for Grim – hit for 8
• Tom hits back for 11 points

That beast sure took a lot of damage – what was up? Willow saw the wolf circling out in the dark, ready to come back. Kip got his silver tipped arrows (from the defeated humans) ready. He missed his first shot but hit on the second. The wolf reared up and ran back into the dark.

Cody took the chance to give Tom a small heal. Grim held the torch and spotted the wolf returning. He bravely stepped into the second row. Kip did another 8 damage with a silver arrow, followed by another 5 damage with a third arrow. The wolf went for Rock while Kip inflicted another 5 damage with a fourth arrow.

On the next sweep, Rock, Tom, Ezme all hit the wolf. While no single blow seemed to have much effect, the combination brought the wolf down down this time. We could see it was the silver-tipped arrows that did the real damage. The sword hits were nicks. While we were watching, the wolf’s body shrunk down to a husk of a normal large wolf size (no innards). Kip managed to collect all but one of the special arrows (23/24 remaining). Grim got some healing for his 8 point wound, but the wounds still seemed red afterwards. Cures got him back to 10/11 HP but he still had red rashes.

After some solemn prayer overnight, Ardern told the party the next morning that the wolf was what is known as undead. The party burned the wolf body in their fire. Grim’s wounds seem a little more raw in the morning.

Day and night six were thankfully uneventful.

Another Lone Pine

Similarly, on day seven’s travel there were no events. But that night, while on watch, Rock and Willow saw a big fire flare up around 300-400m away. Tom had asked for an uninterrupted night but was woken for some reason. The trio noticed Grim was having a nightmare so decided to wake him as well.

Grim was sent to sneak up and see what was going on. He saw eight goblins dancing around a lit tree. The tree looked the same as the tall, white pine the party had seen almost two weeks ago – but surely trees couldn’t walk around like that? Grim started feeling nauseous and had to crawl back, report and have a lie down.

Next morning (day 8), we visited the tree. There were now eight smoldering goblin corpses there. So the flames were a form of the tree defending itself? Time for some tree hugging. Grim hugged the tree and felt something funny go through his body.

Cody’s hug generated bits of bark falling off for him (four doses). Ardern tried a hug but got rejected for some reason (probably a die roll). Willow (our proto-druid) came in for some lovin' and got six doses of bark and got three power points back. Ezme tried and failed. It was during watch on night eight that Grim noticed his night-time eyesight was getting damn good. Must be acclimatizing to the plains he figured.

Old Ruins

As we got going on day nine, we saw up ahead what looked like old, ruined buildings. Campfire smoke was coming from them. Grim and Cody sneaked up for a look. There were a couple of intact stone buildings, rubble in the middle, surrounded by a collapsed perimeter wall. We carried on closer – seeing several human bodies around the smoldering campfire (clearly dead – ripped apart, fresh entrails). Three men, two women barbarians. A horse was tethered beside them, with broken ropes suggesting there had

been others.

It looked like the people had tried to get inside one of the buildings because the door was still swinging, open. Or – had some beasty from within (the wolf or something worse?) come out to inflict this carnage? Cody sent a smoke signal (danger) back to the party to come help.

On arrival at the site, Willow calmed the frightened, tethered horse. Kip went looking for the other horses and after a couple of hours managed to find two of the four that had bolted. He came back to us triumphant.

On reflection, the site looked like an old ruined outpost from when Porn city had tried to expand its borders using the towers to defend. Of course we searched the bodies of the miserable barbarians. Besides their basic belongings, we found 70gp, silver tipped arrows and studded armour. One suit of armour fitted Ardern perfectly (but of course would impose a penalty if worn while casting). One suit of armour fitted Grim very well, so he took it.

We burned all the bodies, seemed the best thing to do. This scared the horses even more, but luckily they didn’t run again. The horses gave us the opportunity to move faster as the weaker party members wouldn’t have to walk. We left the accursed place.